Anxiety causes embarrassing blushing

Dear Annie: I am a 25-year-old woman with an embarrassing problem: I blush easily — like, really easily. In fact, I can feel my cheeks getting hot while writing this letter, just from thinking about blushing. I’ve had this problem since I was a kid. I’m light-skinned with reddish hair, so not only am I more prone to face redness but also it’s more noticeable when it happens, because my face matches my hair. My blushing used to be the worst whenever a cute guy would talk to me. Now that I’m older and a bit more confident around men, that’s not so much of an issue, though it does still happen occasionally. The place where it’s the biggest problem is at work. When I’m about to say something during a meeting, my heart begins to race, and as soon as the words are out of my mouth and everyone is looking at me, I feel my face go red hot. The worst part of all this is that knowing I’m visibly red makes me even more embarrassed, and I blush even more. It’s a vicious circle. I’ve tried some redness-reducing creams, but they don’t seem to be effective. Help! What can I do to conquer this? Am I just doomed from my genetics? Bashful

Dear Bashful: This is less about physiology than psychology. Sure, there are things you can try to address the physical aspect of the problem. Hot beverages and caffeine can cause flare-ups for people prone to redness, as can spicy foods, so you might want to avoid those things. You might also want to use warm, not hot, water when washing your face and showering. And drink plenty of cold water throughout the day. But all of these solutions are only skin-deep. Notice how you no longer blush around men because of your confidence. You need to find confidence in the workplace, too. You can try doing this on your own with positive self-talk — reminding yourself that you are a valuable part of the team, that you have a right to speak, that no one (aside from you) is going to remember if you stumble over your words or share a less-than-stellar idea during a meeting. But as this vicious circle has been whirling for quite some time, it may take a professional to wind it down. Cognitive behavioural therapy, in particular, is a good treatment modality for interrupting unhelpful thinking patterns. Consider making an appointment today.

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