REFLECTIVE MOMENTS
Happy hippo awaiting Christmas surprise
How much would it cost to mail a hippopotamus to the relatives in Alberta in time for Christmas? How much wrapping paper would it take to wrap a hippopotamus for Christmas?
Would a hippopotamus fit into a Canada Post parcel bin? Would Air Canada and Westjet have room for a hippopotamus in their cargo holds?
Does the city have a bylaw saying a hippopotamus is not an allowed animal in the backyards of Moose Jaw dwellers? How many plants and leaves would one need to gather to feed a hippo for a day?
How much would the water and sewer charges be to develop a backyard pool of water to keep a hippopotamus wet?
What is the return policy on a Christmas gift of a hippopotamus?
When the e-mail arrived in the in-box the other day, it immediately caught my attention with the question: “want a hippopotamus for Christmas?” And there in an activated colour photo was a hippo pawing the ground, looking devilishly eager to become a gift, or else. Immediately, before even opening the e-mail I began thinking about the faces of recipients Christmas morning if we were to give a hippo for Christmas. I know what the look on our faces would say if some misguided family member gave us such a large present. We would say “oh, you shouldn’t have. ”
But with the eye-catching photo on the World Wildlife Fund-Canada e-mail, this hippo gift might not be such a stretch and it certainly wouldn’t break the budget, a hippo weighing about 3 tons coming in at a mere $40.
You see, the WWF-Canada has an adoption program that it says will work towards conserving wildlife and indeed, the planet. The idea is to pick an animal to adopt, arrange to have a gift card sent to the recipient advising you have adopted a hippo in his or her name. Each adoption package also comes with a high quality plush toy, in this case a plush hippo, as well as an adoption certificate, reusable bag, a species poster and information about the work of the WWF-Canada that is being supported.
If a hippopotamus doesn’t appeal as a cuddly adoptive animal, other choices are available — Canadian lynx, red fox, three-toed sloth, river otter, African elephant, caribou, boy and girl lion, Asian turtle, bald eagle, polar bear (in single or family group), panda, Arctic hare, tiger, grizzly bear, blue shark, black-footed ferret, koala, hedgehog, penguin or a giraffe — all for $40. The family group adopts for $100.
The list also includes the Atlantic puffin: I’ve already got a plush one of them, bought as a souvenir after seeing thousands of them crash-landing into the water as we sat on a Newfoundland whale-watching boat. That puffin reminds me that on that trip the icebergs we were supposed to see had already gone for the season.
If an animal doesn’t strike one’s fancy, for a mere $17.50 one can adopt a male marine biologist or a male polar researcher. The female equivalents must be priceless as none are available to adopt. Hmmmm.
No disrespect to the hippopotamus, but I’m leaning towards a panda or a koala, they being smaller and requiring less care and space. And I suspect the recipients would be happy with those choices.
But there’s always a chance someone will want the happy hippo and is able to sing along to all the songs written about the hippopotamus. Do I want one for Christmas? Not this year, especially when I have my heart set on one of those robot floor cleaners.
Joyce Walter can be reached at ronjoy@sasktel.net