FIVE THINGS YOU NEED TO KNOW TODAY

Etiquette expert and speaker Thomas Farley ( known as Mister Manners) stresses that people should have a reasonable baseline for life in an apartment complex. Here are five things to understand about living in close quarters.

1 YOU’RE PROBABLY NOISY, TOO

“Sound is the No. 1 issue in most shared complexes,” Farley says. You have to expect noise, but it’s also give- andtake. To test your own noise level, Farley recommends turning on music, and going into your hallway. If you can hear the music, it’s too loud. And if your neighbours have children, be more sympathetic than angry. The parents probably have enough on their plates.

2 ADJUST YOUR EXPECTATIONS

On his third day at home, one university student heard the sharp rhythms of a drum slice through his living room, lasting hours into the night. The drums “threw me, but I kinda dig it,” he says. “I think the fact that we’re all facing similar challenges can break the ice between neighbours.”

3 SMALL GESTURES GO A LONG WAY

Don’t vacuum during work hours, do greet neighbours in the hallways, and if possible, take the stairs instead of the elevator to help neighbours feel more comfortable with fewer people in a small metal box. One condo resident regards these small but significant gestures as huge points of impact, and also help you remain positive in a time of uncertainty. “We have to be tolerant and kind and civil,” she says. “We’re all a bit on edge.”

4 TELL NEIGHBOURS YOU’RE THERE

Apartment dwellers can be notoriously independent and may not have gotten to know their neighbours. Here’s an opportunity to chat ( from a distance) and commiserate about your social isolation. You could simply leave a note on a neighbour’s door, just to let them know you’re there and can possibly help with something. It often makes them feel safer.

5 DON’T BE SHY ABOUT REACHING OUT

Organize a virtual book club or party. Ask the building manager to help publicize and co- ordinate it, or post a notice in the lobby or set up a building Facebook page. Being neighbours is a “fundamental reminder” that you share space with others and that your actions can affect others’ well- being.