‘Duchess Difficult’ and ‘The Hostage’
There was something distinctly familiar about the Oprah Winfrey teaser in which Prince Harry declared: “My biggest concern was history repeating itself.”
The words, due to be aired during the Duke and Duchess of Sussexes’ tell-all interview Sunday night, bore an uncanny resemblance to a statement released by Jason Knauf, his communications secretary, in November 2016, after the Sunday Express had revealed the prince was dating the American actress.
Confirming “his girlfriend Meghan Markle” had been “subject to a wave of abuse and harassment,” the statement criticized the “racial undertones” of newspaper coverage, adding: “Prince Harry is worried about Ms. Markle’s safety and is deeply disappointed that he has not been able to protect her. This is not a game — it is her life and his.”
The unprecedented salvo created two important narratives around the former Suits star: it confirmed her status as the woman in Harry’s life but also positioned her in the eyes of the palace and the public as the victim at the heart of a media “storm.” As the statement suggested, a line had been “crossed.”
Two years later, Knauf would submit a bullying claim, accusing Meghan of driving two personal assistants out of the household and undermining the confidence of a third staff member.
The Duke and Duchess of Sussex have denied that the prince pleaded with Knauf not to pursue it, claiming the couple were the victims of a calculated smear campaign based on misleading and harmful misinformation. They said the Duchess was “saddened by this latest attack on her character, particularly as someone who has been the target of bullying herself and is deeply committed to supporting those who have experienced pain and trauma.”
Those highlighting the “outrageous bullying” say they want to “tell the other side of the story” to the picture expected to be painted by Meghan on the Oprah special of her “almost unsurvivable” time in the Royal Family.
“Anyone who is a victim can’t bear to watch it,” said one.
The couple’s lawyers insist that Buckingham Palace is manipulating the press to peddle a “wholly false narrative.”
The Daily Telegraph has spoken to a number of wellplaced insiders who witnessed the turmoil within the royal household.
All spoke on the condition of anonymity, amid claims they had been operating in a “climate of fear,” where employees were routinely “humiliated” in front of their peers and repeatedly subjected to “unreasonable demands” by both Meghan and Harry.
Behind palace gates it quickly became apparent after they announced their engagement that Meghan had no intention of her and Harry being seen as the “supporting act” to the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge, despite their seniority in the royal pecking order.
“What Meghan wants, Meghan gets” may have been shouted by Prince Harry to Angela Kelly, the Queen’s personal assistant, following a row over a tiara, but royal aides were already well acquainted with the importance of meeting the Duchess’s exacting standards.
“Everyone wanted her to be happy because they knew that would make him happy,” said one. “Do whatever it takes to make it work for Meghan, was the mantra. We all cared deeply about Harry. Contrary to this idea that they weren’t supported, we were going to great lengths to accommodate their needs.”
So much so that there was an extraordinary incident during the couple’s first tour of Scotland, when members of the palace PR team “body blocked” Gina Nelthorpe-cowne, Meghan’s former adviser, during a visit to an Edinburgh café in what one former aide described as “the most embarrassing moment of my professional career.” The Duchess had apparently expressed “a reluctance to make eye contact” with Nelthorpe-cowne.
“Anyone from the past was a problem,” observed the former aide.
Nelthorpe-cowne’s name would later reappear in court documents accusing Jessica Mulroney, Meghan’s close friend and stylist, of “putting pressure on her to withdraw or change statements” she had made in an April 2018 interview with the Mail on Sunday.
In the piece, Nelthorpe-cowne described Meghan as: “Picky, not only when it comes to her clothes but also her colleagues, instantly dismissing those who didn’t share her ‘vision’.”
Describing how the Duchess had “given me a bit of a difficult time” after meeting Harry, she added: “Meghan likes to move on.”
As the world was gearing up for what the LA Times had billed as “A royal wedding for the 21st century,” behind palace gates, the atmosphere was becoming increasingly fraught.
Staff had already grown well used to “email bombardments” by Meghan and Harry, with one stating: “The last thing we’d do before going to sleep was reply to their messages and the first thing we’d do in the morning was reply to their messages.
“Weekends, holidays, there were no boundaries. They live on their phones all the time.”
Despite publicly claiming they largely ignored the press coverage, in reality the couple were often consumed by it. “They’re both very thin-skinned,” said one former employee. Meghan’s supporters say staff members “who preferred a more genteel pace” could not keep up with the Duchess’s “American work ethic,” with one close friend now suggesting the criticism was racially motivated: “Find me a woman of colour in a senior position who has not been accused of being too angry, too scary, too whatever in the workplace.”
Rumours of Meghan being dubbed “Duchess Difficult” began to surface around the time it emerged that Angela Kelly, who has served as the Queen’s closest aide since 2002, had been given a tongue-lashing by Harry.
The argument erupted after the Duchess demanded that Queen Mary’s Diamond Bandeau Tiara be produced for an unscheduled hairdressing appointment before the wedding.
“Angela told Harry it was priceless and couldn’t suddenly be handed over at short notice. He was furious and shouted: ‘What Meghan wants, Meghan gets’. Suffice (it) to say it didn’t go down too well.” So badly, in fact, that the no-nonsense 53-year-old, who has her own fearsome reputation among colleagues, reported the incident to the Queen, prompting a grandmotherly telling off for Harry.
Little did the Prince know at the time that staff had also given him a nickname: “The Hostage.”
According to one person with first-hand knowledge of the events: “They insisted that they had the same inflation-adjusted budget for the wedding as William and Kate. She got the choir she wanted, the dress, the carriage procession, the tiara. She got everything she wanted but it still wasn’t enough.”
Although the couple wanted their spokespeople to deny it, a story about Meghan requesting air freshener to be sprayed around the “musty” St George’s Chapel was true, according to multiple sources.
By the time the Sussexes had returned from their honeymoon, relations between the Sussexes, the Cambridges and their staff had become so bad that Harry and Meghan appeared reluctant to engage with anyone at the June 2018 leaving party for Miguel Head, Prince William’s former private secretary. According to two sources, the couple “remained aloof” throughout the bash in the private garden at Kensington Palace.
Matters came to a head in October 2018 following the departure of a second member of the Duchess’s private office.
Knauf emailed Simon
Case, then William’s private secretary, after conversations with Samantha Carruthers, the head of HR. Case then forwarded it to Carruthers.
The email read: “I am very concerned that the Duchess was able to bully two PAS out of the household in the past year. The treatment of ‘X’ was totally unacceptable.
“The Duchess seems intent on always having someone in her sights. She is bullying ‘Y’ and seeking to undermine her confidence. We have had report after report from people who have witnessed unacceptable behaviour towards ‘Y’.”
The email concluded: “I questioned if the household’s policy on harassment and bullying applies to principals.”
The palace is now holding an investigation having been criticized for failing to act sooner. It was not until a month later that it was reported that Melissa Toubati, Meghan’s former PA, had “quit suddenly,” after just six months. The following month it was announced that Samantha Cohen, the couple’s private secretary, would not stay in post after the Sussexes’ baby was born.
The couple were apparently “furious” about reports of their high staff turnover. According to one former employee: “What people fail to understand is Harry’s hatred of the media is probably one of the most important things in his life. It is defining for him. So the narrative is always it’s the press’s fault, never theirs.”
It was around the time that the couple moved to Frogmore Cottage in Windsor in March 2019 that Amy Pickerill became the third staffer to leave.
By September, relations with the media were at rock bottom at the start of the Sussexes’ tour to Africa.
Royal aides were then left dumbfounded when what had been a surprisingly successful 10-day trip with Archie was overshadowed by Meghan’s interview in which she revealed the “struggles” she had faced adapting to life in the Royal Family.
Harry then unleashed an attack on the tabloid press. He said some newspapers had published “lie after lie” at Meghan’s expense, simply because she was out of public view on maternity leave. “Because my deepest fear is history repeating itself. I lost my mother and now I watch my wife falling victim to the same powerful forces.”
The interview set the tone for their January 2020 announcement that they would be “stepping back as senior Royals” to become “financially independent.”
Now, as the world gathers to watch the most highly-anticipated royal TV event since Diana’s Panorama interview, it will be left to the viewers to decide which version of history represents the truth.