MacArthur not ready to hang up skates

CONCUSSION BATTLE

CBRUCE GARRIOCH larke MacArthur has returned to the ice at the Canadian Tire Centre because he’s not ready to shut the door, throw in the towel or extinguish the fire that burns deep inside to pull on his No. 16 jersey again.

Unable to get clearance in January to return this season four months after he suffered his fourth concussion in the last 18 months in training camp, the 31-year-old MacArthur initially travelled to Fort Myers to give retirement a shot. But MacArthur said Sunday that as hard as he tried he couldn’t walk away.

“I basically, in all honesty, went to Florida to try and retire ... That worked for about the first week,” MacArthur said. “I thought the whole week that I had convinced myself to move on and do something different. I didn’t know what to do or where I was going with it but I was just trying to check myself out of hockey.

“By the second week, I was like, ‘I’m going to start going to the gym again’ and by the third week I was talking with (Senators strength coach) Chris Schwarz and he was emailing me workouts, and by the fourth week I was looking at flights to come back.”

MacArthur was skating with injured teammates Bobby Ryan and Chris Neil last week while the Senators were on the road. He hasn’t played an NHL game since he suffered a concussion on Oct. 15, 2015 against the Columbus Blue Jackets.

MacArthur was so close in January. After having a baseline test, he was prepared to suit up Jan. 21 against Toronto. Instead, on Jan. 20, GM Pierre Dorion told the media MacArthur wouldn’t play this year. The news was devastating. “I was really upset, frustrated, and you’re wondering, ‘How did this happen?’ Not just the hit in camp but the string of events over the last couple of years for a person who loves to play and wants to play, how did this happen?” MacArthur said.

“That’s just part of life. At the end of the day, there’s a reason things happen and that’s not just in hockey. It doesn’t make sense at the time but you have to deal with it.”

When he met with Dorion and athletic therapist Gerry Townend, neither told him to quit.

“I remember both of them saying, ‘This is an awful time but it’s not over and it’s only over if you want it to be over.’ They gave me the option to do whatever I needed to do for myself, which was great.”

At this point, the best approach is to just see what happens.

“I have the love of the game and want to keep playing,” MacArthur said. “The scary part is, ‘Did you do everything you could to try and get back?’ If you did and you still can’t get back then I can live with that or I’ll have a chance to live with that. But if I leave a stone unturned or don’t check every avenue or do everything I can then it’ll be hard to live with for me. I know that.” Does he think he’ll play again? “Deep down I think I’m going to pull the jersey on again.”