Thechatter Etiquette is on the line

If Black Mirror has taught us anything, it’s that we are never alone; technology is always with us. Whether it’s your laptop in front of you or your phone playing phantom limb, you’re always connected to something external and, therefore, always a little bit distracted.

Default behaviour is scrolling – through Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, Tinder – whether you’re on the subway or waiting in line or even while watching TV. And because it’s become such an instinctive habit, we do it when we’re talking to friends, to family, when we’re on a date and when we’re going through the check-out line.

So when should you press pause? We all know we shouldn’t be talking on the phone or texting while driving, at a movie or in a meeting, but what about during the everyday?

There’s a difference between one-on-one and casual interactions. When you’re on a date or having a face-to-face conversation with a friend, family member or co-worker, there’s a level of expectation because you’re with people you know and presumably respect. Undivided attention is demanded and, let’s be real, it’s the least you can do. Texting another friend or tweeting at the same time suggests something else is more worthy of your attention.

In these scenarios, tuck your phone away, far from the dinner table if you can stand it. At the very least, ignore incoming texts, and if you absolutely have to answer a call, leave the room and, for the love of god, don’t use speakerphone.

But that’s pretty obvious advice. What about more casual encounters: when you’re paying for your groceries at the register, buying a movie ticket, grabbing an Uber? There’s a far smaller level of expectation here because these are not people you know and you really only need to share a few words. But that doesn’t mean they’re any less human. In a recent Reader’s Digest story, Starbucks baristas said some of their biggest pet peeves are when customers are so busy on their phone while waiting in line that they miss their order, or when they’re having loud conversations as they’re ordering, confusing both the barista and the person on the other end. In cases like these, you don’t need to shove your phone into your pocket or turn off your music, but you can pop out an earbud, make eye contact, end the call, and be sure to offer a “thank you.”

Whether someone is your best friend, your mom or serving you coffee, a level of attention is owed to them, simply for sharing common ground as a member of the same species. That’s just basic decency, and besides, Siri and Alexa will always be there when you get home.

There are very few nights where I don’t consider ordering some form of takeout or delivery for dinner. I used to feel bad about this, but between UberEATS, Just-Eat and Foodora, meal delivery apps have become so popular that any guilt or shame that once surrounded these services has evaporated.

Recently, a new wave of food delivery services has begun promising much more than the odd sushi dinner enjoyed from the comfort of your living room. In trying to compete with online food delivery platforms, grocery chains have introduced ultra-efficient delivery services of their own. In Canada, Loblaw, Costco, Save-On-Foods and Metro now offer full service programs, as do many other independent grocery stores. While each platform differs slightly in cost and effectiveness, they all more-or-less promise to deliver every food item imaginable with the ease of a few clicks.

But while each service is marketed as a simple and efficient way to shop for groceries, successfully transporting fresh and un-bruised produce, meat and dairy requires endless acrobatics. Bananas have to be kept separate from frozen foods to prevent them from browning; chicken breasts and milk must still in its infancy, estimates from Forrester Research predict that online grocery shopping in Canada is expected to grow to sales of $3.6 billion per year by 2019. Obviously, grocery delivery has the potential to offer a critical service to those physically unable to visit their local store, including the disabled and elderly. But unsurprisingly, a 2017 survey by industry research firm Food Marketing Institute found that millennials are expected to make up most of the industry’s prospected growth.

Of course this is all still hypothetical, but I have already started to notice how the predictions might play out in real time. Recently, during a particularly lethargic evening, I nearly talked myself into ordering a carton of ice cream, among other unnecessary confections, off Instacart, the new grocery delivery platform from Loblaw. As someone who has spent years nurturing a delicate relationship with UberEATS, I have grown accustomed to paying strangers to bring me food. The idea of having someone deliver my groceries seemed only a slight departure from what I have already established as normal.

And yet, there are a dozen restaurants, three convenience stores and a grocery store all within a