Parents say 13-year-old not yet ready to date

DEAR ABBY: I am a 13-yearold girl and my parents won’t let me date. I believe I am mature for my age and won’t do anything foolish. I don’t know why my parents are being like this. Please give me advice on how to persuade them. Really Ready In New Hampshire Dear Really Ready: Although you think you are ready to start dating, your parents will have to make the decision on when you enter the “dating game.” Their decision will most likely be based on whether you have demonstrated the beginnings of emotional maturity.

You need to prove to them you can handle responsibility, carry out school assignments and chores, be honest with them and keep your word. It will also depend upon whether they know the boy in question, and whether HE is responsible enough to be trusted with their most precious possession, which is you. Dear Abby: I have been married 27 years to a church pastor. We have had to move every six to eight years, partly because he was repeatedly unfaithful. We have gone through his alcoholism, gambling and womanizing, and my two suicide attempts. We have been trying to work things out, but I suspect that he’s back to his old ways.

I work part-time, but haven’t been able to find a full-time job, so I am financially dependent on him. I have two adult children who don’t live near me. Most of the people I know are through the church, and they are all supporters of my husband.

I feel trapped, and I don’t know how to fix my life. Have you any suggestions? Trapped On The East Coast Dear Trapped: You will have to do it in stages. The first should be to talk with a licensed therapist who is not associated with the church. It will help you to clarify your thinking and become more emotionally stabilized.

Next, continue looking for full-time employment. If necessary, start by volunteering. It will help to widen your circle of acquaintances and perhaps lead to a job. Dear Abby is written by Jeanne Phillips, daughter of Pauline Phillips, the original Dear Abby. Write Abby at www.DearAbby.com or c/o The Ottawa Citizen, Box 5020, Ottawa, K2C 3M4. For a reply, send a self-addressed envelope. Abby covers postage. Include name and phone number if you want your letter published.