‘Imagine what it’s like to live with PTSD’
Re: ‘I’m going to keep fighting until I win this battle,’ Nov. 11.
Living with a person who has post-traumatic stress disorder is really no fun. They can be moody and snap at you for the smallest thing. Their behaviour can change just like that; one moment you’re enjoying yourself and the next the tension in the air is almost palpable. Often, you don’t know what set off this change.
There’s no rhyme or reason. It’s enough to drive anyone mad.
Truly, living with someone who has this condition is a challenge. There are times when one feels like running away from them, I am sure. It can be frustrating dealing with nightmares and night terrors. Separate beds is often the only way to get a decent night’s sleep around them — or even a safe one.
People with PTSD can also be unreliable. At times, they can’t even keep a job. They often push away the ones they love. I don’t know why, but they do and it’s frustrating. The flashbacks, the anxiety, they are all such nuisances, really. No wonder people with PTSD often end up alone. They’re just no fun to be around. Mind you, there are some good days, too, I guess.
There are days when they seem perfectly normal. But you can’t let yourself be lulled or fooled by that. PTSD doesn’t go away, not easily or quickly, anyways. They can get better, but there’s no cure. In some cases, it is downright crippling for life. It’s like they live in two worlds at the same time, one full of fear and pain, and you never know when they’re in that world or not. So, yes, living with a person who has PTSD sucks, big time.
So imagine what it’s like to live with PTSD. I am amazed that my partner hasn’t left me. Her patience and understanding make a big difference. I think I am lucky. I will be grateful to her forever.
PTSD is more prevalent than people think. We read about it and hear about it in the news, but we don’t really know much about it. I wish to highlight the important role that loved ones and family play in helping those with PTSD to recover, if they can, over time.
I am grateful for my partner Daniela. Without her I don’t know where I would be today.
And to all the people who give of their time and of their energy to help someone with PTSD make it through their day, I say thank you so very much.
FRANçOIS LAVIGNE, Ottawa, Former Canadian Security Intelligence Service officer