Buying a beer becomes an adventure in Big Apple
First, we purchased the wrong tickets at the subway station.
“Umm guys, are you going to the ball game?” asked the friendly stranger. “Those are for the train to Jersey.”
Of course, The Bronx is nowhere near New Jersey.
That problem solved, and a halfhour ride and a big box of packed sardines later, a quartet of Ottawa sportswriters sought tickets to Yankee Stadium for Wednesday’s game between the Bombers and the Blue Jays.
“Four together, first level, 50 bucks each,” demanded the scalper. Too much, we said. “Thirty each,” he replied. Deal. Of course, purchasing stubs this way is an illegal activity, even in New York.
“Break it up and move along guys,” said the cop, as we prepared to make the exchange.
“No problem,” Slim Shady told us. “I’ll walk with you a bit.”
The pair of Goody Two Shoes in our foursome suddenly had cold feet.
“Let’s just buy from the box office,” said Bruce. “Yeah, OK,” said Scooter. “This guy is going to give us seats in the second level for $20 each,” Marc said after a chat with another scalper. “Let’s grab them.” “Ok,” said I. Bruce and Scooter already had their goody two shoes in line at the ticket window, so our group split in half.
Scooter sent me a text saying their legally purchased stubs on the same level were $21 bucks.
Marc and I did a fist bump. We saved a buck each. It made paying $12.50 for a Stella Artois a little easier to swallow.
“Two beers please,” I said to the lady at the concession. “What are you going to have, Marc?”
The pouring had already been completed when the lady asked for my ID.
I handed her my driver’s licence.
“You’re not from the U.S.,” the lady astutely stated. “No, I am not,” I said proudly. “This isn’t good enough,” she said. “I need to see your passport. Everybody not from the U.S. needs to show their passport. Otherwise I can’t serve you.”
Now, I’ve never understood why everybody gets asked for ID at sports events in the States. I mean everybody. I’m 56 years old. I know I don’t act or look my age, but surely to God we all know I’m much older than 21. I remember being at TD Garden in Boston as a fan a couple of years back and the lady beside me was asked for ID. She told me she was 80. “I’ve already been served two Shock Tops, and I didn’t have to show a passport,” said our friend Mike, who is 66 and still looked like he was going to go over the counter. “Who brings their passport to a ball game?”
The beer lady went to check with her manager.
“He says I can’t serve you without a passport,” she said upon returning. “Sorry.”
It wasn’t a big deal. I just went to another beer lady who gave me a couple of Stellas after glancing at my driver’s licence.
But I just wanted to share this with you, in case you’re planning to come to New York for Game 6 of the Senators-Rangers series. If you plan on having a beer, bring your passport.
And know that somehow, some way, it’s because of Donald Trump. And now, back to our regularly scheduled column. STARTS AND STOPS: This time, the Senators were able to “manage” the first 10 minutes, at which point the game was scoreless and they trailed 6-4 on the shots clock. They just stank the other 50 ... After two periods the Senators were down 3-0 and being outshot 20-16. The numbers flattered them extremely on both counts ... The Senators led in both hits and faceoff wins in the first two periods. Sometimes numbers mean crap ... The only time Henrik Lundqvist had to be sharp through 40 was on an attempt off the skate of a charging Jean-Gabriel Pageau in the 27th minute ... It seemed the “checker’ had officially become Ottawa’s only threat until Kyle Turris’ meaningless tally late in the game stopped Pageau’s streak at four in a row, dating back to Game 2. IN THE CREASE: And then there’s Craig Anderson. His night started with a Mika Zibanejad shot off his head 55 seconds into the game. In the second minute he stopped a Michael Grabner breakaway. But why he was glued to the goal-line, and not coming out challenge Nick Holden on the first Ranger goal, is anyone’s guess ... What’s worse than allowing Grabner speed in for another breakaway in the second? Giving up a 2-on-0 to Grabner and Oscar Lindberg, who made it 2-0 ... Anderson made some good saves in the second, notably off Rick Nash on a 2-on-1. But Lindberg’s second goal was just brutal. Instead of simply putting up his blocker to direct the harmless shot into the corner, Anderson reached across his body to try and catch it. Guy Boucher showed great patience waiting until the intermission to yank him. I would have done it right then and there, and if you’re being honest, you would have, too. ON A BRIGHTER NOTE: Better celebrity sightings than Game 3, if only because Susan Sarandon (Bull Durham) was the first ... The video board camera turned on Michael J. Fox (Back To The Future) and, a little later, Michael Che (Saturday Night Live) in the second ... President Trump landed at JFK at approximately 6 p.m. for the first visit back to his “hometown” since being elected. If he did show up at the game, he wasn’t deemed worthy of a celebrity sighting by the board operators.