Names of Ottawa’s dogs a window into the inner lives of their owners

Phinous Martha ChubbChubbs and Jaroslav the Tsar walk among us. It’s true. Both are dogs. Phinous, a female, Jaroslav, a male.

These are good dog names. And they’re all good dogs, aren’t they? (Some of the names, on the other hand ... )

What breed of dogs Phinous and Jaroslav are, couldn’t tell you. Just that they exist. And they’re just two of the 29,718 dogs registered with the City of Ottawa. The city kindly provided the Citizen with a list of all dog and cat names in town — at least those that are registered with the city.

And they’re great. Alfred Reginald FuzzyTrousers is another top contender. Sam (aka Winnin Big Time). Commander Cody Pickleman is ruler of someone’s living room.

And The Dark Lord Voldemort, presumably, is out menacing the townspeople.

But, leaving aside the amusing (OK, weird) names, the top choice in Ottawa for a dog is Bailey — there are 314 of them. Cute.

Next, there are 299 Maggies. (Or some variation, as there are some Maggie Maes and one Maggie Tequila Mexico Gallant. There are, additionally, four Maggys.)

There are 69 Hunters. There are 132 Bears. 48 Brunos. 29 Molsons. 9 Scruffys. 8 Chewbaccas. 9 Homers. 6 Khaleesis (after Game of Thrones character Daenerys Targaryen).

4 Poochies (the ill-fated onetime character in The Simpsons show Itchy and Scratchy). 3 Scooby Doos (and 1 Scooby Do) 1 Root Beer. 1 Princess Leia. 1 Jesus Murphy. 1 Jacques Daniel Wooferson. 1 Dreadnaught. 1 Gandalf, two Shadowfax (both from Lord of the Rings).

2 Harley Quinns (from Suicide Squad).

It gives a look into the inner lives of Ottawans. Buy a dog, you’ve got to come up with a name.

Ottawa, with its reputation for being boring, shows a certain flair on the dog names. Sometimes. There are, after all, 7,615 unique names.

There are only two Rovers, for example. But ... 36 Snoopys.

But, also, there are some politics nerds out there, naming their pups after people of the past.

There’s one Mackenzie King. One Diefenbaker. One Darcy McGee. One Bytown. Two Rideaus. Two Trudeaus (no first name, though). One Theodore “Teddy” Roosevelt Jr. Three Napoleons.

Then, the truly, truly uninspired: There’s one New Dog.

And there’s one dog simply named ... Dog.

Poor girl.

ASHLEY FRASER Ottawa may have a reputation for being boring, but we show plenty of imagination when it comes to naming our dogs.