‘It was meant to be’
Valentine’s Day is more than hearts and flowers for this couple
It doesn’t matter how old we get, our hearts will keep going. It may be tragic, but at the same time, that’s how love feels. — Jeremy Abramson on his fiancée, Jessie Huggett
We’re born alone, we live alone, we die alone. Only through our love and friendship can we create the illusion, for the moment, that we’re not alone.
ORSON WELLES, writer, director
All I ever learned from love is how to shoot at someone who out drew you.
LEONARD COHEN, Hallelujah
Love is a fire. But whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you can never tell.
JOAN CRAWFORD, actress
To right the unrightable wrong To love, pure and chaste from afar To try, when your arms are too weary To reach the unreachable star.
JOE DARION, The Impossible Dream
Love is when the other person’s happiness is more important than your own.
H. JACKSON BROWN JR., author
Some people care too much. I think it’s called love.
WINNIE THE POOH, courtesy A.A. MILNE
Jeremy Abramson doesn’t just remember the day he and his fiancée, Jessie Huggett, became more than just friends.
He remembers the hour and the minute.
It was 11:46 a.m. on Valentine’s Day of 2011, the year after the couple — who didn’t remember meeting at a playgroup as babies, although their moms did — reconnected at an employment program.
They were in the boot room, Jessie recounted, when she nervously told him how she’d been feeling. She didn’t want to jeopardize their friendship.
“I told him that I had romantic feelings for him,” Jessie said. “And he said, ‘I have romantic feelings for you.’”
“And then, I was like, ‘Do you want to give us a try?’” Jeremy said.
“And I said ‘yes,’” Jessie said, with happy tears welling in her eyes.
“Basically, it’s like fate,” Jeremy said. “Our parents said we first met when we were, like, eight months old at CHEO; our moms became friends; then we were separate and got reconnected in 2010; and then we got together in 2011. It was meant to be. It was like 1990 or something when we first saw each other.
“And the rest is history.” They ’re both just 28 but over several chats the pair explained how their history together has already included both devastating lows — such as Jessie being diagnosed with a rare Moyamoya disease, suffering strokes and undergoing brain surgery in 2016 — and highs, such as getting engaged last Valentine’s Day.
Through it all, they’ve been inseparable.
Jeremy, in a suit and tie, greeted Jessie with roses when she returned to Ottawa by “private jet” — their joking description of an air ambulance — and filled in for her on the panel of self-advocates who steer the Canadian Down Syndrome Society as she healed.
“We think that all people with Down syndrome should be heard,” Jessie said.
Separately, each said that they love that other has big dreams.
Jeremy says Jessie is outgoing and funny with a “gorgeous” sparkle in her eyes; Jessie says that she loves his big heart and how he “makes me feel whole.
“I had two strokes and he was there for me every step of the way,” Jessie said. “He comforted me by telling me everything was going to be OK. He asked my dad for my hand in marriage.”
“I can be very comforting, can’t I, babe?” Jeremy joked.
“And you always give the best kisses,” Jessie replied.
They ’ll spend this Feb. 14 dining at the Canal Ritz, where a year ago Jeremy got down on one knee to propose.
They ’ll talk about their hopes for the future.
Jessie, already a performer with Propeller Dance who’s appeared in a string of videos, wants to do more acting while Jeremy, who plays hockey and works at Costco, hopes to launch a fitness business or even break into wrestling.
And while Jessie’s healing has delayed her plans to live independently — Jeremy already lives on his own — they have twice-weekly date nights watching movies, dancing or writing songs. They hope to be talking wedding plans by next Valentine’s Day.
The best part of being married will be “spending every day together,” Jeremy said.
They’ve started premarital counselling — communication and compromise are key to making a relationship work and every couple has arguments, they report. But Jeremy says that Jessie has never made him mad, while Jessie’s biggest complaint is that he’s sometimes silly when she’s trying to have a serious talk.
Each credit their parents and future in-laws with helping them be together.
“It’s important to me because it’s important to her,” said Jessie’s mom, Nancy.
“A relationship is part of everything that we all want, I think. Whatever that relationship, a loving relationship is something that enhances all of our lives. Most of Jessie’s life has been navigated by her, the direction has been set by her, so we’re very much supportive of what she wants to do and try to make the community and everybody else help those things come true.
“Also, as we support Jessie and Jeremy in their relationship, we also get support in understanding what a relationship can be. You can’t do anything but smile when you see Jessie and Jeremy together.”
They haven’t pinned down a wedding venue — both Niagara Falls and a beach came up in conversation — but they know their first dance will be to Celine Dion’s ballad My Heart Will Go On, from the movie Titanic.
“It doesn’t matter how old we get, our hearts will keep going,” Jeremy explained. “It may be tragic but at the same time, that’s how love feels. I always tell her she’s like a fighting champ. She went through a lot and I’ve always been by her side.”
To anyone not newly-in-love, Valentine’s Day can seem like so much candy-coated capitalism, but Jessie and Jeremy beamed with infectious excitement at having a special day coming up to celebrate each other with dinner, dessert and gifts.
“It’s our seventh anniversary (and the anniversary) of when we first got engaged,” Jessie said. “Valentine’s Day is one of my favourite times of the whole season.”
“Valentine’s Day is really sacred,” Jeremy added. “It’s like the day of love.”
Being in love means caring for and comforting one another, feeling wanted and wanting to make someone else happy in return, he said.
“Love opens your eyes.”