Client a bit too open about her love life

Q My job places me in direct contact with clients, including a woman and her husband, both early 40s.

Recently, the woman said they’ve started a polyamorous relationship. She seemed to be waiting for my reaction. She told me they each had one other partner so far.

I don’t know any other couples with that situation, and I wouldn’t want it for me and my boyfriend. So, I changed the subject.

Later, a co-worker said my client was testing me, if I was interested in joining their arrangement.

Do you agree? If yes, how do I handle it the next time she or her husband raise that topic? Awkward Conversation

A Your client’s a very direct communicator.

She was testing your reaction. Maybe she’s curious about what others think of a couple agreeing to each have one or more added sexual partners.

Or, maybe you seemed the right “fit” and she was checking if you’d be turned on to joining them.

Be direct in return. Say it’s not something you’d ever consider for yourself. Then change the topic.

On future visits, don’t let her.

Reader’s Commentary: “I feel badly for the grandmother who’s not seen her grandson since his first birthday.

“We were a big part of our two grandsons’ lives until they turned age eight. That’s when their mother suddenly refused to let us see them.

“We were devastated. I saw a lawyer and learned that ‘grandparents have rights too.’

“We told the mom and she let us start seeing them again. We said, ‘This isn’t about their father, it’s about us and the children.’

“They’re now teenagers and we’re so happy that we have them in our lives. They needed us just as much as we needed them.

“That grandmother should seek a lawyer. It’s not fair for the child or her not to have a relationship.”

Ellie: These grandparents acted wisely in seeking legal advice and then communicating directly with the mother. They reassured her that they were doing this strictly for the sake of the children (not their son).