EMPOWERING MEN TO PREVENT SEXUAL VIOLENCE
Because most sexual assaults in Canada are perpetrated by men — including assaults against other boys and men — building empathy and emotional depth among men is a critical part of ending genderbased violence.
“There’s not a lot of time when young men get to talk about what it means to be a man, so growing up we don’t have the tools to think critically about our masculinity. We just kind of adsorb it through pop culture and our family life, what we see around us,” says Matt Schaaf, the program manager of MANIFEST Change, a sex-ed framework in Ottawa aimed at empowering teen boys to end sexual violence.
Schaaf describes one of the program’s exercises: A facilitator will ask a group of young men to think about the men they appreciate in their lives, and what they like about those relationships.
Often the responses from participants include things like, “he always makes time for me, he’s kind and compassionate, he gives back to his community and he always calls me on my BS.”
“That is what young men say they love about (other men),” says Schaaf. “But when you flip the question and ask how’s a man supposed to be … they start talking about all the pressures to dominate and be dominating and win at all costs, in a win/lose scenario and not in a ‘We all get our needs met’ scenario,” Schaaf says.
That’s the thinking the program aims to challenge. Schaaf says making spaces where young men can try on different perspectives and challenge each other can help teach them to be more resilient to conflict and seek out relationships where power is shared. It can also create a climate where bystander intervention is a norm.