TODAY’S ATHLETE REQUIRES A NEW WAY OF COACHING

Yelling at young players and belittling them doesn’t work and has serious consequences

Take a deep breath. Hold it in and slowly let it out, picturing all the negative tension escaping your body.

Now, talk to yourself. Tell yourself that you are in complete control of the situation, that you know what you’re doing and that others are relying on you — and trusting in you — to get the job done.

Good? Now, go out there and get behind the bench.

This meditation technique is one of many suggestions included in the Coach’s Educational Program, which the Ontario Hockey League submitted on Dec. 20, 2016. It is essentially a code of conduct for “coaching today’s athlete.” And the results have been positive.

While it seems each new day includes a new allegation of past inappropriate conduct in the NHL, the OHL is moving forward in a kinder, gentler world where players and coaches have a shared relationship built on trust and respect.

“Touch wood, we haven’t had any complaints recently,” said Paul Dennis, a sports psychologist who has previously worked for the Toronto Maple Leafs and Hockey Canada.

“They’ve embraced the notion that today’s players are different, that they are a highly self-conscious group and that self-image is crucial to success.

“Emotional abuse and intimidating tactics are not going to get the best out of the players. We’ve addressed that with the coaches.”

Welcome to coaching hockey in 2019, where it’s better to be calm and in control than emotional and angry. It’s no longer OK to threaten, belittle or even kick over trash cans or break sticks to get your message across. You can’t even yell in some instances.

“We’re teaching them to be empathetic,” Dennis said. “It comes down to respect. There’s no excuse that we’re trying to get the best out of you.”

Three years later, in light of the firestorm of inappropriate conduct that has gone unchecked in the league for two decades and more, the NHL is expected to release its own code of conduct when the Board of Governors meet with Gary Bettman on Monday and Tuesday.

Something had to be done. With Bill Peters out of a job in Calgary and Marc Crawford on a leave of absence from Chicago and several other coaches ostracized as old-school bullies, it’s clear the league is in need of a philosophical coaching change in how to motivate.

There are obvious differences between junior hockey players and those earning millions in the NHL.

But Dennis believes the way in which coaches treat players should remain the same.

“I honestly don’t believe there is a difference,” Dennis said.

“We’re all human beings. We all have the same emotions, we all have the same pain when we’re attacked in front of a group, whether we’re 18 years old or 28 years old.”

The biggest difference, according to Dennis, is with today’s athlete. This is a person who grew up with an iPhone in their hands (“get ready to communicate with them while they look around and not into your eyes,” he said) and a grandiose perception of themselves.

They are not only the most technologically advanced generation, but they are also the most self-conscious generation.

Self-image is crucial for success. They have a strong desire to succeed, but they also expect success to come quickly and have a sense of entitlement.

Enter the coach.

Imagine a stubborn coach such as Mike Babcock being around a team of entitled, self-centred players who are on their phones all the time and who insist on doing things their own way.

It might be natural to want to break them down, to threaten them, and to even instil fear.

According to Dennis, this is the wrong approach.

You don’t use fear as a tactic. You can warn a player but you cannot threaten him. You can correct but you cannot criticize.

You must communicate — not ignore them.

“We define psychological destructive behaviour,” Dennis said. “Any time they’re using threatening, belittling, intimidating language is emotional abuse. You can’t lay a hand on anyone. You can’t throw an object.”

If a coach does overstep his boundaries, it must be reported. It could come from the player, his teammate, an assistant coach or trainer. But that old mantra of “what happens in the dressing room stays in the dressing room” is no more.

In the case of abuse, Dennis will meet one-on-one with the coach and address the concerns.

Emotional abuse and intimidating tactics are not going to get the best out of the players. We’ve addressed that with the coaches.

In addition, he meets with teams at the beginning of the season to ensure that the core values of the league are being implemented.

“That culture over the decades has been that you accept it and players remain united and are performing to the best of their abilities in spite of the coach,” Dennis said. “But today’s player is a lot smarter. They know what’s unacceptable. They grew up part of many anti-bullying campaigns and know not to be a silent bystander.”

In the OHL’ Coaches’ Educational Program, there is a checklist on communication and leadership skills. One of the questions asks if a major priority of the coach is to show his athletes that he cares about them. Another asks if he thinks about the emotions behind his actions.

This is important, Dennis said, because a scared player is not an effective one — for both shortand long-term success.

“My biggest concern is that by introducing this program, we’re treating these players like snowflakes and that they’ll melt at any form of adversity,” Dennis said. “But the psychological behaviour, the coaches don’t realize what’s happening. We’re trying to teach them that these are the consequences. In the short term, the effects of these tactics are that the players lose focus and performance decreases. Long term, these emotional scars last a lifetime. They lead to substance abuse.

“Coaches don’t want these (consequences) to happen. Coaches talk about it being a close-knit family. Well, you don’t treat family members this way.” mtraikos@postmedia.com twitter.com/Michael_Traikos