Leonard Cohen revisited in 2018

Dear editor: It was 30 years ago this month that Leonard Cohen released his classic album, I’m Your Man. One of the album’s highlights, Everybody Knows, has been variously described by critics as “bitterly pessimistic” yet funny, or, more strongly, “a bleak prophecy about the end of the world as we know it.”

At the 2017 Juno gala dinner, son Adam Cohen recalled that his father “was one of the only people I know, who had the most absurd prediction that anybody in my midst would dare have: he predicted Donald Trump was going to be the president of the United States, which of course made us all laugh hysterically.”

Leonard Cohen died Nov. 7, 2016 at age 82— one day before Trump defeated Hillary Clinton in the U.S. presidential election. I hope Leonard Cohen will be pleased with this slight rewrite of Everybody Knows: Everybody Knows 2.0 Everybody knows that there’s no collusion Everybody smiles when the camera’s on Everybody knows the game is over Everybody knows the fake guy won Everybody knows his temper is quick The rich get richer, the poor get sick That’s how it goes Everybody knows

Everybody knows who’s doing the leaking Everybody knows that The Donald lies Everybody got this broken feeling Like their country or their dog just died The top one per cent fill their pockets Where does Wolff send the box of chocolates? Now I suppose Everybody knows

Everybody knows what he said to Billy Everybody knows all his tweets are true Everybody knows he reads all documents Ah, give or take a time or two Everybody knows the spineless GOP And there were so many Russians he just had to meet With a friendly pose And everybody knows

Everybody knows, everybody knows That’s how it goes Everybody knows

Everybody knows, everybody knows That’s how it goes Everybody knows

And everybody knows that it’s now or never Everybody knows how much he offends And everybody knows that you live forever Ah, when you’re watching Fox & Friends Everybody knows the chaotic West Wing Do the Dreamers mean anything? What will Mueller disclose So everybody knows

And everybody knows that he’s a racist He knows very fine people on both sides Everybody knows he said ‘s-hole countries’

Everybody knows the button he wants to try Everybody knows he has three TVs And there are so many cheeseburgers he just has to eat When in repose Everybody knows

And everybody knows that he’s in trouble Everybody knows that it’s time to go From the plaque below the Statue of Liberty To the beach at Mar-a-Lago Everybody knows 15 women’s names And who it is they blame That’s how it goes Now everybody knows

Everybody knows, everybody knows That’s how it goes Everybody knows

Everybody knows, everybody knows That’s how it goes Everybody knows

Everybody knows the very stable genius Everybody knows of serious voter fraud He knows more about ISIS than the generals

Everybody knows Mexico pays for the wall

Everybody knows loyalty’s a one-way street Fire and fury will have lots of heat So before it blows Everybody knows

Everybody knows that there’s no obstruction Everybody knows he paid the porn star Everybody knows he’ll talk to Mueller As long as it is not behind bars Everybody knows the memo’s cherrypicked

Dems who don’t clap are a treasonous clique They are his foes Everybody knows

Everybody knows, everybody knows That’s how it goes Everybody knows…