A guide to Canadian inventions
Actor writes books as his alter ego — Possum Lodge’s inept handyman
Over the years, Steve Smith has developed a system for writing books as his alter ego Red Green.
“I start with just a list of ideas and I don’t write anything until I have 100 ideas,” says Smith, in an interview from his Ontario home. “Once I have 100 ideas then I shame myself into writing. I say to myself ‘if you can’t find one thing that you can expand from 100 ideas, you really should be looking for another line of work.’ So I embarrass myself into writing one. When I write one ... I have to put two back in. I never feel like I’m starting with a blank page.”
It’s hardly surprising that Smith has settled into a tried-and-true routine when it comes to conjuring up the sarcastic and inept handyman of Possum Lodge. It’s been 27 years since he first came up with the character, initially thinking The Red Green Show would be a short-lived “summer job.”
Now, the 71-year-old comedian is so recognizable as the suspender-wearing booster of duct tape that it’s hard to separate the actor from the character.
While Red Green’s popularity continues to grow in the U.S., he is generally considered as Canadian as they come. So it’s natural that he would eventually turn his literary eye to the country’s considerable accomplishments. The newly released The Woulda Coulda Shoulda Guide to Canadian Inventions (Doubleday Canada, 2017), is a suitably irreverent take on Canadian resourcefulness. Smith was golfing with Brad Martin, CEO of Penguin Random House Canada, when the idea arose. Why doesn’t Red Green celebrate our sesquicentennial with a take on Canuck inventions?
Smith loved the idea. For one, it took away what he sees as the hardest part of writing.
“When I write a book or anything, I don’t have anything to start with,” Smith says. “There’s no setup. You have to create the setup, which is always the hardest part. So here I am starting with a bunch of inventions. Great! And the Red Green take on it was how could have they been used, how they should have been used and we did it better but just a little bit off. That kind of stuff made it fun.”
Woulda Coulda Shoulda covers dozens of inventions. Some are undeniably cool — basketball, the Canadarm, the goalie mask, instant replay, the snowmobile, the walkie-talkie, Superman. Some are undeniably vital — insulin, the cardiac pacemaker. Some are undeniably dull, but useful — Pablum, the green garbage bag, egg carton, carbide acetylene. And some tell us perhaps more than we want to know about our national character — Hawaiian pizza, the UFO landing pad, fivepin bowling.
Smith, as Green, uncovers some strange side notes to a few of the inventions.
George Retzlaff, the producer of Hockey Night in Canada, credited with inventing the instant replay in 1955, got so much flak from CBC brass the first time it was used that he never used it again. The saddest-inventor award goes to Norman Breakey, who came up with the paint roller in 1940 but didn’t have the money to patent it. An American. “swooped in” and beat him to it.
“Tragic, tragic,” says Smith. “He’s going door-to-door to hardware stores to sell it. He needed a partner or something. Somebody with money.”
But if there’s a through line, it’s that most of these inventions are sensible, although clearly not all, says Smith.
“They tend to be pragmatic inventions. Maybe it’s a situation where we sense we have to take care of ourselves. The climate isn’t particularly conducive. We’ve got to have shelter and we’ve got to have machines to make our lives palatable.”
The Red Green Show ran from 1991 to 2006 on CBC and on PBS in the U.S. Smith doesn’t see the show returning, saying he has no interest in reviving the character for the small screen. Thanks to YouTube though, Red Green continues to be popular, including among young people who may or may not even know it was a TV show. Meanwhile, Smith continues to tour various one-man shows as the character, including one he is currently performing in the U.S.
Not bad given the fact Smith had plans to retire outright when The Red Green Show ended in 2006. “When I retired, my problem was that I was taking out all my creativity on my friends,” Smith says. “They were dropping like flies. I had to get an audience to share the load.”