This is Not Me, by L.J. Nelson.
I was born in a small city hospital in Saskatchewan in the early 1960s. I weighed seven pounds, three ounces and was twenty-one inches long. The medical care professionals regarded this birth as normal and I was sent home after the mandatory three-day hospital stay.
Soon afterwards, a nurse, who later became a great support for my family, approached my mother and informed her that the size of my head seemed unusually large. While uncertain what condition I had, this professional believed that something was wrong.
The diagnosis, when made three months later, was a mystery to the professionals in our community. I was given the diagnosis of achondroplasia, a form of dwarfism, medically known as skeletal dysplasia. There were only a few professionals in the province who knew what this condition meant.
My family would experience a lot of ignorance, numerous prejudices and preconceived judgements of the condition for many years.
My awareness that I was any different from my siblings or friends happened gradually. By age eight or nine, I knew I was tinier than others but really didn’t comprehend why people stopped, stared, or called me “midget.” I recall asking my mom why I was being called “midget” and she simply explained the word meant small. At the time, that was the only explanation I seemed to need. There would be many more opportunities to ask my parents similar questions as time went by.
By this particular age, I knew where to line up when my class was required to line up from tallest to shortest. My best friend during this time was also of shorter stature, so I didn’t feel isolated or singled out. I knew that most clothes purchased for me had to be hemmed. I was different, but I didn’t feel different. I felt special.
Growing up, I wished at times that I was different for other reasons. If I was going to be noticed, I wanted to be noticed for qualities other than my stature. However, the reality of the stares, the name-calling and the attention during certain periods of my life overwhelmed me and I needed a time-out. So I used the fantasy of TV stories and movies to draw me away from my realities, and continued in an instilled belief that someday there would be a miracle medical cure for me.
L.J. Nelson’s memoir is about relationships — with her family, friends, strangers and even herself. It is about her experiences and perceptions living in Saskatchewan. That is Not Me — A Journey of Perception (ISBN: 9781525519741) is her first book. It’s available at McNally Robinson and Indigo Books in Saskatoon, or for order online through her website: ljnelson.com. During July, L.J. hopes to concentrate on working on her next book and attending the annual Saskatchewan Festival of Words held in Moose Jaw, where well known authors gather to mentor and share their experiences with writers and readers. L.J. is planning a trip to the west coast in August to promote and share her book with those interested.