Stop having sex with the ex

This was first published in 2012.

Dear Annie: I was with my exhusband for 18 years before I divorced him. We have three children, and he hasn’t been the best father or husband. Lately, however, he has been nice and comes around to visit the kids. I appreciate that he is doing this, but he is now saying things to me that make me uncomfortable.

He slept on my couch a couple of nights because he stayed late with the kids when I was out. But now he is coming every day and staying over every night. We often end up sleeping together.

I told him to stop coming around with the expectation that we are getting back together, because we are not. But he refuses to listen, and now he has asked me to marry him again. He won’t take no for an answer. Think I’ve Been Too Nice

Dear Think: For starters, stop sleeping with him. By allowing him to spend the night in your bed, you are encouraging him to believe there is hope. If you are serious about keeping him as an ex-husband, you must put an end to the couch sleepovers. When you return home, insist that he leave the premises. If you don’t have the backbone for that, drop the kids at his place instead.

Dear Annie: How do you handle someone who constantly interrupts? She always knows more about the story and makes me feel inadequate. We had a good group of friends, and this person ingratiated herself into our clique. Only one of the other women likes her, but it’s enough to keep her around. Annoyed

Dear Annoyed: Does she do this with everyone, or only you? If it’s just you, it could be that you take a long time to get to the point, or you monopolize conversations more than you realize. However, if she does it to everyone, you can say, “I’m sure you have something to add, but I’d appreciate it if you would let me finish first.” Many people who interrupt do not realize they are doing it. Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column.