Do not hand over your money

Dear Annie: I work in a large organization and know my colleagues quite well. Though I enjoy working with them, a number of them recently have begun borrowing cash from me. These are usually requests for small amounts to cover the cost of lunch or coffee, but over time, they add up. Not a single one of them has ever voluntarily repaid me. When I ask, the person inevitably looks surprised, smacks his or her forehead and says, “Sorry, I forgot,” before handing over the money.

It’s not that I don’t want to be helpful and collegial, but I have come to realize that if I don’t pursue those in my debt, I’ll never get the money back and will have to write off those sums. Even if my colleagues aren’t doing this intentionally, I can’t help thinking that in some way, I’m encouraging irresponsible behaviour.

Is there a professionally appropriate way of saying no the next time I’m asked for cash? California Casey

Dear California: You have apparently been tagged as an easy mark in your office. It’s perfectly OK to say pleasantly and politely, “I’m so sorry, but I can’t loan you the cash today.” You don’t have to give a reason.

If you say it often enough, they will assume you don’t carry that much money any longer or that you aren’t willing to part with it. Either way, they will leave you alone.

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column.