Daughter may hold grudge
Dear Annie: My daughter hasn’t spoken to me in 20 years. “Linda” is 45 years old and has been married since around 1993. I wasn’t invited to her wedding, so I am not sure. I think she received a master’s degree, but I wasn’t invited to her graduation, so I’m not sure of that, either.
Linda’s mother left me for her married lover when our daughter was six. My current wife enjoyed a good relationship with Linda. We visited her during her college years and gave her money, but once she finished her degree, we never heard from her again.
Linda’s brother told me that she and her husband have four children we have never met. The oldest must be about 16 and the youngest about 3, but I do not know their birthdates. When I tried to find out why she stopped all contact, she said, “Whatever the reason that you think it is.”
Linda was trained as a family counsellor. What happened in her training that would lead her to refuse a relationship with her father? Father Who Can’t See His Child
Dear Father: This has nothing to do with Linda’s training. More likely, it is some grudge she has been holding onto for years. Ask your son to be an intermediary. Have him tell Linda that you are sorry for anything you may have done, and you want to know how to reconcile.
Dear Annie: I am only 11, but I want the truth.
I have had a best friend, “Janie,” for about four years. I am an only child, and my parents are divorced, so Janie is everything to me. I recently started middle school, and now we only have one class together. Janie recently became friends with another girl. I don’t think I can compete with this girl, because she is really pretty and wears designer clothes.
Janie and this girl always hang out together, and it makes me feel really left out. I can’t lose her. Should I do something ? If so, what? Lost and Alone
Dear Lost: In middle school, it is not unusual for kids to develop new interests and new friends. If Janie is so shallow that she chooses her friends based on their clothes, she’s not a true friend.
It’s OK to tell her you miss the friendship you once had and then see whether she is more attentive. It’s time for you to make friends who are steadfast and appreciate you as you are.