Story of child abuse doesn’t add up

Originally published in 2013.

Dear Annie: I’m a single mom of a four-year-old boy who is being abused by my ex-husband and his wife. After a visit, he comes home bruised, scratched and with black eyes. He has had scabies more than a dozen times.

I don’t speak negatively about his father. But when it’s time for my son to visit him, he cries and begs to stay home. He says, “Daddy hurts me, and I’m scared of him.” My son sees a child therapist, and she’s worried for his mental health. My son’s teachers, pediatrician and therapist have all called Child Protective Services, but for some reason, they don’t investigate. I was told they don’t consider this abuse.

What can I do? Is there anybody who can help?

Angela, No State, Please

Dear Angela: We do not understand how Child Protective Services could ignore abuse reports from teachers, pediatricians and therapists. Something isn’t adding up. Contact your local child abuse hotline and report the situation. You also can try childhelp.org and your local police.

Dear Annie: My husband and I are a blended family with grown stepchildren and grandchildren. His three married kids all have triple-digit incomes and upscale homes. I have two daughters, neither of whom makes that kind of money. How do we keep things equal when it comes to gift giving ?

Don’t Want My Kids Shortchanged

Dear Don’t: Are these gifts given jointly, or do you spend on your kids and he spends on his? If the former, each child should get gifts of equal value. If the latter, he gets to decide what he spends, and so do you, equal or not. The fact that his children are better off doesn’t mean they should be punished any more than yours should be rewarded for having less.

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column.