CELEBRATING LOVE, SUPPORT
‘No matter what a family looks like, there’re ways to celebrate it’
Rob Norris and his daughter, JQ Norris, who identifies as queer, have fun on the rainbow crosswalk created outside city hall to celebrate the city’s Pride festival. Rob Norris says being able to mark Father’s Day and Pride at the same time is special. JQ, who came out at age 12, is ‘a terrific daughter,’ he says.
Father’s Day is a double celebration for Brent Beatty — a day to celebrate as any father would, and a chance to take part in Pride Festival activities.
Beatty came out when his daughter, Cam, was about a year old.
It’s a similar occasion for Rob Norris and his daughter, JQ Norris, who came out when she was 12.
For Beatty, the reaction was positive, but he also got many questions about how the decision might affect his daughter, and how she would understand.
Although Cam was too young to remember anything other than her parents being separated, she quickly grew accustomed to her father being in a relationship with a man.
“She definitely had a lot of questions, like ‘He’s a boy and you’re a boy, how does that work and why does that happen?’ But really, I think right from the start she just kind of understood that’s a decision that people can make,” Beatty said.
JQ Norris said she was lucky to have immediate support from her family, because she knew a lot of people who didn’t have the same experience. Rob Norris said he believes parents should love their kids, no matter what. When he received JQ’s coming-out letter, he felt honoured to be part of the conversation about who his daughter is, he said.
“Here was a really young woman who was self-aware, who was articulate, who was brave. I was really humbled because I wouldn’t have had that capacity at 12 or much later on, and she was really being a role model. I saw a young leader taking a positive step forward,” he said.
Saskatoon Pride celebrations are one of the many ways families can get involved in supporting family members who identify as LGBT+, or to learn more and be an ally, organizers say. This year, there are various family-friendly events, all of which are free to attend.
Upcoming events for families include the parade on June 23, and a family day carnival at the Saskatoon Forestry Farm Park and Zoo on Sunday.
Making every family feel it’s part of the community is a big focus, said Amy Rees, co-chair of Saskatoon Pride.
“No matter who you are, whether you’re allies or whether you’re part of the community, there’s something you can bring your kids to, and expose your kids to a really cool and special community and group of people.
“I think the more that we know, the more that our kids know, the more accepting they’ll grow up to be.”
Beatty acknowledges that some might disagree, but he made a point of taking his daughter to Pride events every year since she was two.
“If we have more of those events that we can take our kids to and feel comfortable, having them go there and explore the topic and do things like drag-queen story time and do the welcome to the gaybourhood event, or check out the main stage in the park, then they can celebrate and get more comfortable with the idea of that love, too,” he said.
His daughter can celebrate and be proud of him and his partner together. And it gives her an open mind.
“It’s important for me to kind of convey that message forward to her — that no matter what decision you make about who you love and who you want to be with, love is love,” Beatty said.
For both families, being able to celebrate Father’s Day and Pride at the same time is special.
Father’s Day plans for Beatty include spending time with his daughter and his partner before going out to a family dinner.
The Norris family also hopes to spend some time together, Rob said.
“She’s a terrific daughter, and I love her, and the fact that we can have Father’s Day and a celebration of Pride in and around the same time, it just makes Father’s Day all the better.”
For her part, JQ said it’s important to celebrate non-traditional families.
“If I do have children, they probably won’t have a dad in their life, so I think it’s an interesting way to celebrate father figures in children’s lives, but also recognize that, no matter what a family looks like, there’re ways to celebrate it,” she said.