Wife needs help with hoarding habits

This column was originally published in 2013.

Dear Annie: My wife and I have been married for 30 years. When our oldest son left for college, my wife began using his bedroom for storage. Soon, there was barely a path to the bed. It happened again when our second child left. Now both bedrooms are jammed full. Our attic is overflowing and we rent two storage spaces.

I fear my wife has some form of OCD. I am considering tossing stuff myself. If I throw away the junk, how will she react? I cannot live like this. — Drowning in Junk Dear Drowning: Your wife is a hoarder. It’s possible this was kicked into high gear by the stress of her children leaving the nest, but if it is getting progressively worse, she needs to seek treatment. However, unless she agrees to it beforehand, we don’t recommend you toss things out while she is away. Instead, call your doctor and ask for a referral to a mental health specialist. You also can contact the International OCD Foundation (iocdf.org) for more information.

Dear Annie: Please print this list of what not to do when visiting with your dog: Do not allow your dog to jump on my furniture; if your dog does its business, clean up the mess; do not let your dog eat off of my china or snatch food from the table; do not expect me to put my cats outside because they do not get along with your dog.

I never let my children misbehave at someone’s house, and I expect dogs to behave equally well. I used to have dogs, but I would never dream of taking them to someone else’s home unless specifically invited to do so. — Anonymous

Dear Anonymous: Some folks consider their animal companions to be their “children” and expect others to treat them accordingly. But this is an unwarranted assumption. It is important to first ask whether it is OK to bring a pet, and if the answer is “no,” respond graciously and make other arrangements.

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column.