Grad notice is no place for gift registry

This column was originally published in 2014.

Dear Annie: Can you tell me the proper etiquette for graduation announcements? A relative is graduating from a military academy and wants to put a note in her announcement as to where she is registered for gifts. Is this appropriate?

Aunt

Dear Aunt: No. The only time registry information should appear is with baby and wedding shower invitations, where gifts are expected. Otherwise, it is wrong to send out notices inferring that the recipient is obligated to bring a gift.

Dear Annie: I have followed the many outraged responses regarding adult children who have cut elderly parents out of their lives, so let me give another view.

My mother is 86 and possesses all her faculties. Both of my sisters cut her out of their lives years ago. Why? Because Mom has a cruel mouth and is bigoted, gratuitously insulting and highly opinionated.

Mom complained that she has been shunned because of her age, and I told her it is because she is unpleasant, impossible and that she should get counselling. She responded with a well-chosen two-word obscenity. So I’m done. I have tried with great patience to keep Mom in my life, but she is so difficult that I, too, have finally thrown in the towel.

Please tell your readers that the behaviour of some adult children may be abundantly justified. Finished in Chicago

Annie’s Mailbox is written by Kathy Mitchell and Marcy Sugar, longtime editors of the Ann Landers column