Learn, practice, adjust, repeat
Practice, Adjust, Repeat.
Were these four steps towards understanding offered by: A) A Lacrosse coach B) A musician specializing in hammer dulcimer and flute
C) A children’s author (including The Tale of Rosy Bun-bun)
D) The husband of a Cégep-level psychology teacher
E) The father of a grade-school aged daughter F) Someone with Dwarfism G) A child from a family of six children
H) Someone who spent part of their childhood growing up in the Townships I) All of the above You probably had a hunch that I was leaning towards “i”; if so, you are correct.
All of those features are some significant elements in the life of Frank (François) Verpaelst – now living in Montreal – who has just self-published his memoirs, a powerful paperback entitled “Tales of a Gutsy Dwarf”.
As mentioned, Frank is one of six children. He is also one of three (Frank, a brother and their only sister) from that family who have Dwarfism. He and his wife Bonnie (yes, the Cégep-level psychology teacher mentioned above) live in Montreal (no, Bonnie does not have Dwarfism), with their daughter, Annika (no, Annika does not have Dwarfism either), where they inspire one another through their love of music, the arts, and generally being witty, brilliant folk.
Frank’s book takes us immediately to places we don’t expect. He outlines forms of bullying that are almost impossible to imagine – including that of a fellow patient on one of Frank’s many long stays in hospital. There is zero wordmincing, but there is most definite reflection and calculated retaliation that brings readers to the raw place that some people forget is a part of childhood (and that we find hard to fathom in children’s hospital wards).
Learning to find his ground in situations that were once all-too-common in the medical world, that border on justified freak show exhibit, have produced a person who has an awareness of how one cultivates dignity, pride and self-respect while being called upon as a specimen, a study, a category, a check box.
Frank takes us beyond check boxes, beyond expectations, beyond limitations, while sharing a great love and understanding related to his upbringing, appreciation and humour related to his observations, and also boldness and authenticity when naming some of the less pleasant (or downright nasty) experiences he has gifted his readers with a window into.
Exploring self-esteem and how to manage in a world inundated with imagery telling us who/how/what we’re supposed to be, Frank Verpaelst makes no bones about calling out mullarkey particularly on how people with disabilities are often told to cope. Instead of hanging his head and taking all of the stares, the comments, the mistreatment with a mountain of salt, he actively sorts his surroundings and his community into what is nourishing to him as a person, all the while naming what doesn’t work out there in the land of make-believe (yeah, that’s pretty broad chunk of society). On this topic he states, “It’s not the person with low self-esteem who needs the most help, it’s those nasty ninety-nine people who need a lesson in manners. It’s those ninety-nine bullies who are the ones who need serious therapy and lessons on how to treat people better.”
This book is so well-rounded when it comes to topics – it’s reading that takes us to places that are right around us, yet that we can’t visit unless invited in. Frank has taken the time to bring us there. He brings us through rock ‘n roll, the discomfort of dating (if you haven’t felt discomfort while dating, you were probably not paying attention), purple aliens, toddlers, determination, self-perception, chess, Lacrosse, creativity, family memories and more.
Tales of a Gutsy Dwarf is an invitation to the beautiful fringe. An invitation that will hit close to home for many, and offers a viewpoint that only Frank could take us to, and no, that’s not a ‘short’ joke, because Frank takes us far beyond any of the heights you or I have witnessed, with his unique viewpoint, and the time and effort he has put into sharing with us.
The book is currently available on www.lulu.com – although a simple search of Tales of a Gutsy Dwarf and/or Frank Verpaelst’s name will yield the link where the book is featured for sale at the modest price of $12.95.
Congratulations Frank Verpaelst on doing the Townships proud! With any luck, in time, a book tour will take place .... and readers of The Record will be among the first to know.