A harmonious plate

FRIDAY, SEPTEMBER 27, 2019

Dear Annie: I read with interest the letter from “Kitchen Confidential” who had feelings regarding her partner’s unhealthy food choices in comparison to her own. I am 68 and have lived a vegan lifestyle for nearly 15 years. My husband is 71 and a huge meat and cheese fan. He will often eat the healthy foods that I cook, and later in the evening fry up a slab of ham.

At least I know he has had something nutritious when he eats what I cook. I have never made his food choices a battleground, and we respect each other’s right to eat the way we want. We often find humor in our food choice differences, and he frequently brags about my eating lifestyle to his friends. He, however, is not interested in converting to a lifestyle of plant-based eating.

“Kitchen Confidential” may want to consider cooking several healthy, tasty meals each week that would appeal to her partner if she is that concerned about his food choices. Then she could be thankful if he eats them with her. I find you can’t change people’s opinions about food (or a lot of other things!), but it is up to them to decide what they want to do. — Make Mine Veggies

Dear Make Mine Veggies: I am printing your letter because you touch on two great points. One, people can’t force anyone to do anything they don’t want to do. Change must come from within. And two, you have healthy eating habits and that, by so doing, you have set a great example for your husband. Joking about food choices is wonderful, too, especially because your husband is proud of your vegan lifestyle. Laughter promotes good health.

Dear Annie: Now and then, I used to stop by a fast-food place when out shopping. It had an excellent salad bar. One day, I was walking around it, adding things to my plate when a mother carrying a baby and accompanied by a little girl of 4 or 5 walked by, heading for a table. The little girl said, “I want salad.” The mother snapped, “You’re too short.” I saw them sitting at a table later with burgers, fries and milkshakes. Mom was overweight and didn’t need the extra calories. She was in a bad mood.

I’ve thought that I should have offered to help the little girl or watch the baby who was in a carrier that she had placed on the table, but thought it best not to interfere. I sometimes wonder if the little girl ever got a salad when she grew taller. — Observer in Connecticut

Dear Observer: It can be a difficult thing to watch a little girl be put down by her own mother. One can only hope that she got her salad — if not that night, then later. As for interfering, I can see the mom responding both ways — being appreciative that you could help the little girl get a salad or being resentful that you butted into a family dinner. You probably did the right thing by staying quiet. Though it’s easy to make snap judgments, you never know what’s happening behind the scenes or what type of day this mom had before you saw her. A little compassion goes a long way.

“Ask Me Anything: A Year of Advice From Dear Annie” is out now! Annie Lane’s debut book — featuring favorite columns on love, friendship, family and etiquette — is available as a paperback and e-book. Visit http://www.creatorspublishing.com for more information.

Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.

Let your emotions rise to the surface. It’s time to put what you want first. Let go of people and situations that are standing in your way. You are the master of your universe, so make your dreams come true by taking the initiative and doing what you do best.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 23) — Address issues that bother you. If you are blunt about what you want to see happen, you will find out who is willing to help you and who isn’t.

SCORPIO (Oct. 24-Nov. 22) — Don’t get involved in someone else’s affairs. An emotional situation will surface if you get together with people you haven’t seen for some time. Avoid drama.

SAGITTARIUS (Nov. 23-Dec. 21) — A positive attitude will make a difference when you’re dealing with people who are looking for a fight. When all else fails, know enough to walk away from discord. Romance is favored.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19) — Pay close attention to what others say and do. Don’t overreact, but be wary of being misinformed or drawn into something that could disrupt your life or a meaningful relationship.

AQUARIUS (Jan. 20-Feb. 19) — Take a look at investment opportunities and expand your interests, skills and knowledge. A family estate or settlement should be handled with care. A personal commitment should be honored.

PISCES (Feb. 20-March 20) — Offer help, but within reason. It’s essential to stick to what you feel comfortable spending or doing. Don’t feel guilty if you must step back.

ARIES (March 21-April 19) — Someone’s actions and words will offer insight into his or her motives. Don’t be judgmental, but do protect your reputation and question the relationship you have with this person.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20) — Discipline and hard work will pay off. Changes can be made that will help you gain strength and give you the courage to try something new. Strive for perfection.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20) — If it feels right, do it. Refuse to let someone’s negativity or criticism stop you from making personal adjustments that will help you feel good. Romance is in the stars.

CANCER (June 21-July 22) — Relax and think about what’s happened or what you want to initiate. You’ll face opposition from someone who wants to meddle in your affairs. Don’t reveal secrets or personal information.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) — Take on a challenge or do something that will make you feel good. Spending time with a loved one or starting a routine that will help you look your best is favored.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) — Look, see and do. Turn a negative into a positive. Fortitude and courage will help you bring about positive change. Let go of the past and embrace the future.