Aging “gracefully”??

Is it just me, or is the notion of “aging gracefully” downright perplexing? Please note, the following is written from the perspective of a “devil’s advocate”. On the surface, the words “aging” and “gracefully” are noticeably at odds. My research tells me that to age could mean…to ferment, wear out, crumble, slump and fade. To be graceful could include being… beautiful, nimble, smooth, agile and easy. For the sake of argument here, should “effortless” really be sidling up to “elderly” on a park bench at some assisted living facility? With these adjectives, could “easy” and “old” be having a May/december fling?? Hmmm. When I look in the mirror or listen to my bones after a half-day’s worth of yard work, Ringo Starr’s song, “It Don’t Come Easy”*…comes easily to mind.

The solar eclipse had me thinking about aging and…life with a capital “L”. Aging and ailments seem to go hand in hand, and “misery does love company”, so in search of answers to this quandary, I asked a few friends of a similar age, “What’s your take on aging gracefully?” For the most part, their answers were philosophical and… how shall I put it…so resplendent with grace, it was amazing. However, one of my friends answered succinctly, “It sucks!” Bravo Carole for an honest, quick-draw shot from the hip. Another trusted friend, Morgan, answered wisely, “It’s mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter!” He went on to clarify, “Why be concerned about things that are ultimately out of our control.” Brilliant!

Now, again just for fun…allow me to “Get By With A Little Help From My Friends.”* (Would-be albeit). In 1951, two years before I was born, the Welch poet Dylan Thomas wrote, “Do not go gentle into that good night. Rage, rage against the dying of the light.” I love that poem. Nothing “graceful” sounding in there. And then, there’s the greatest comedian of all, George

Carlin who said, “Life’s journey is not to arrive at the grave safely in a wellpreserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, totally worn out, shouting… holy s**t...what a ride!” Once more, there’s nothing “graceful” about that. And…you guessed it… I love it.

When all is said and done, I know that, “In the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make.”* Now that…is graceful. Consequently, I have a much more positive approach to aging than this letter would suggest. I came of age at the right time and have been a lucky guy from the get-go. For 55 years, I have been so fortunate to share and enjoy life with a partner who, despite significant and long-standing health issues, continues to be an amazing model for what it means to “age gracefully”. In virtue of my “wife”… I am able to fathom the perplexity of… “life”. Hey, that rhymes! Now, Julie…if you could just …“unravel time-travel” for me.

My personal odometer will read 71 on the 11th of August. Baby boomers will remember that older vehicles would “roll over” when the odometer reached 99,999.9 “miles”. Yep, they’d reset to zero and “prest-o change-o”, you had a new car. Now, I’m not saying that I would want to reboot to zero, but would 24 be too much to ask? I know, I know…never gonna happen…for any of us. And so, while hanging on for dear Life and regardless of any pain or perplexity…may we all enjoy the ride. Like taxes, the terminus is “Comin’ Up Around the Bend”.

* You knew I had to get a couple of Beatles references in there somewhere.

Is it just me?