People

He’s rich! He’s outspoken! He’s running for US President! But does he have any of these life-enhancing gadgets? We bet he doesn’t!

Donny T: a man in the limelight right now for absolutely no good reason. So let’s find out what sort of tech makes this oddball

US Pressy-candidate tick

spray as you go

01 ryobi one+ P620

Even if old Trumpy never gets into the White House, he could still live in a

white house. The Ryobi One+ P620 paint sprayer can help him to achieve this in record time. It can coat both indoor and outdoor surfaces, in three patterns and at any angle. What’s more, it uses up every drop of paint in the cylinder, meaning there’s no waste at the end. And we all know that Donald’s on a tight budget.

£87, diy.com

SHOOT TO ( NOT ) KILL

02 PETRON STEALTH PISTOL

During his presidential election campaign, the Republican leader declared, “I could shoot somebody and I wouldn’t lose any voters” (ignoring the fact that if he shot someone who was going to vote for him, he’d lose at least one). To prevent him causing any harm, we suggest the Stealth Pistol. It fires 12 suction darts up to 40 feet, and comes with a cut-out target, which he could pretend is Hillary Clinton.

£15, red5.co.uk

BOT WITH THE LOT

03 UBTECH ALPHA 1S RO BOT

For many years, Trump hosted the US version of The Apprentice, only quitting when he embarked on his political career. But he can still have an apprentice in the shape of the Alpha 1S. With 16 degrees of freedom (the equivalent of human joints), this intelligent ’bot can sing, play football, do Tai Chi – just about anything you program him to do. Vote for Donald Trump? Now, that’s just unrealistic.

£500, red5.co.uk

food for thought

04 ANOVA PRECISION COOKER

If Trump loses the election, he might want to give politics a swerve and try something new. Our tip? He could buy Anova’s kitchen gadget and experiment with sous-vide cooking (bear with us here). Attaching to any pot, it controls the temperature of the water to ensure your food is cooked to perfection. Before long, he’ll be making millions selling his (wait for it…) ‘Trump Steaks’ (and there’s the punchline).

$199 (£183), anovaculinary.com

BEA M HIM UP !

05 BARNE T WINER

Trump once stated that if he was elected President, he’d change his hairstyle – his thinking being that he’d be too busy “working my butt off in the White House” to maintain his current ’do. So this month’s imaginary-gadget suggestion is a smart comb that he can control via his phone and that’ll style his barnet (double combovers, treble combovers, you name it) while he goes about offending, er, governing his people.