How do you keep the sun off your house, Guru?

AADAM LAWLOR, TUNBRIDGE WELLS

The windows of Guru Towers are perpetually curtained, because GaGu must do anything possible to maintain his local reputation as a spooky technological vampire. He uses Ikea’s block-out range (the Majgull and Hilleborg lines) which will set you back between £25 and £35 for inconspicuous super-dark drapes. On those windows without curtains Guru didn’t need to stray far, with Ikea’s Fyrtur smart blinds doing a credible job of squashing the influence of that pesky glowing orb in the sky.

Conservatories are, as we all know, the absolute worst. They just are. GaGu, naturally, has two of them, being both a glutton for punishment and something of a liar. To treat the polycarbonate one, he’s used special film; there are loads to choose from, some with a mirror finish, some frosted, which go between the layers of polycarbonate and provide surprisingly adequate insulation, UV

If you are a sun-hater, just be sure to stock up on vitamin D supplements! blocking and sun reflection. GaGu would suggest getting it fitted properly by someone who knows what they’re doing, and trusting their judgement on which to get.

On the glass conservatory, you can get glass with actual blinds built into it, which seems to Guru to be a dumb idea if the blind breaks and you need to replace the whole window unit. But outdoor blinds are a revelation. While it might seem equally stupid to put blinds on the outside of your glass, it’s really not: why allow the sunlight to bounce around between your glass and your blinds when you could stop it before you get there?

Ikea’s Fyrtur smart blinds do a credible job of squashing the influence of that pesky glowing orb in the sky