Woman called a ‘poser’ for wearing mask in public place

QUESTION: I know everyone thinks COVID-19 is over, but it just isn’t. The more people I speak to, the more I hear that people are getting it, maybe even for the second or third time. And it’s contagious. I’m not health compromised in any way, but I really don’t want to get sick.

I had COVID-19 at the beginning of last year, and I was in bed for almost five days straight, very weak for another week and only working at half-mast for the third week. It really took me a month to fully recover.

I wear a mask when I go into small places with strangers or large places with lots of people. I’m usually the only one. I don’t care. If it helps, it helps.

This morning I went to a coffee shop I’ve only been to once before. It’s on the other side of town, but I had an appointment nearby. I walked in wearing a mask, ordered my coffee, then lifted my mask to taste it before I left.

As soon as I did, a woman nearby muttered under her breath, but loud enough for me to hear, that I was a “poser,” and then went on to explain, not sure to whom, that meant I was just wearing my mask because I was high and mighty.

I pretended not to hear, put my mask back on and left. What was that all about?

— Cautious Not Posing

ANSWER: From the beginning of the pandemic nearly three years ago, there have been people who don’t believe it’s real. People who believe it’s all a government funded ruse. Conspiracy Theorists.

And even some who do believe that COVID19 is a real health issue, don’t believe in being vaccinated and disagree with the rules around the vaccinations. Anti-Vaxxers.

And then there are some who believe it’s real, get their vaccines but don’t believe in wearing masks. Anti-Maskers.

You do you and don’t let anyone else tell you that what you are doing is wrong. It’s not wrong. It’s what makes you feel safe and protected. Ignore the agitators. Hold your head high, mask on, and get on with your life.

QUESTION: How can I get my dad to stop embarrassing me every chance he gets? I may have thought it funny when I was young, but now I just want to disappear. When he knows he’s embarrassing me, and I react, he turns up the volume, or the annoyance.

For example, I play lacrosse. I love when he comes to my games to support me and my team. I love that he cheers loud for the whole team, and calls us out by name. But I don’t like it when he yells embarrassing things like, “Stop running on your toes!”

Help! — Red Cheeks

ANSWER: Just tell him. Tell him you love his love and support, but not at your expense. Tell him you want him around, but not if he’s going to embarrass you on purpose.

READER’S COMMENTARY: I want to thank you for publishing “Happier not Knowing” and the Feedback at a later date. The author of that letter was my husband who found it very therapeutic to write out his thoughts, frustrations, etc.

Your response meant a lot to him. Unfortunately, George lost his battle to cancer and passed away.

He read your column regularly as do I.

LISI: I am so sorry for your loss. Your husband sounded like a remarkable man with strong morals and ethics. I’m glad he got to get all of that turmoil out before he passed. May he rest in peace.

READER’S COMMENTARY: Regarding the woman missing her mom who passed away:

I’m writing about “Miss my mom,” which was in the Waterloo Region Record on

Dec. 23. I lost my mother 26 years ago when I was 18. I remember being overwhelmed by sadness often, but for me, this was comforting. I wish it would still happen on occasion, as I still miss my mother very much.

The overwhelming sadness was a way to show her respect, love, and feel close to her despite her passing. It sounds like “Miss my mom” is otherwise very well adjusted. You do need love and support, hobbies, etc. so that you don’t wallow in despair.