A bevy of beach bars

For a tiny Caribbean speck, Jost van Dyke in the Bri­tish Vir­gin Is­lands, cer­tainly has a pre­pon­der­ance of beach bars

The Guardian (Charlottetown) - - DESTINATIONS - BY STEVE MACNAULL

The sys­tem works. I present a drip­ping-wet $10 bill and bar­tender Mic whips up a wicked-good Painkiller for me.

Af­ter all, this is Soggy Dol­lar Bar on Jost van Dyke in the Bri­tish Vir­gin Is­lands and it’s the stuff of Caribbean leg­end.

The wa­ter­ing hole’s name was coined af­ter tourists swam to White Bay Beach from their yachts and cata­ma­rans with pock­et­fuls of wet cur­rency to buy drinks.

Now, my wife and I landed at Jost van Dyke on a Wind­star cruise so we were bone dry when we ar­rived at the Soggy Dol­lar.

But, I just had to take a dip in the turquoise sea with $10 in the pocket of my swimshorts in or­der to have the full-on Soggy ex­pe­ri­ence.

By the way, the Soggy Dol­lar in­vented the Painkiller, a heady mix­ture of white rum, fruit juices and nut­meg with a fi­nal splash of dark rum, ap­par­ently, as bar­tender Mic says, “to make you horny.”

Mic is a busy boy mak­ing 10 Painkillers at a time and putting the dry bills in the cash reg­is­ter and hang­ing the soak­ing ones on a mini-clothes line.

There’s not much to do in Jost, ex­cept to play in the glit­ter­ing Caribbean and fre­quent beach bars.

We gladly ac­cepted the mis­sion. So, it’s off to Foxy’s. Foxy, aka Phili­ciano Call­wood, is an­other is­land in­sti­tu­tion.

His epony­mous beach bar is right on the sandy path that dou­bles as the main street of this is­land that has a whop­ping pop­u­la­tion of 300.

When we ar­rive on a rainy Tues­day night, the place is hop­ping like it’s the Satur­day of a hol­i­day long week­end.

Ev­ery­thing’s slightly po­lit­i­cally in­cor­rect at Foxy’s, from the names of the drinks we or­der (Frig­gin’ in the Rig­gin’ and Bananawhacker) to the dirty danc­ing and the off-colour jokes Foxy, 77, tells me.

Foxy sug­gests we go back to White Bay Beach dur­ing the day to pop into his son’s place, One Love Bar & Grill, a shack where the walls are made of old life­jack­ets, buoys, nets and other beach junk.

We do, and or­der a lunch of lob­ster que­sadilla, Carib beer and a de­cent glass of pinot gri­gio.

Also on White Bay there are Coco Loco’s, which has a wood­burn­ing pizza oven, and Ivan’s Stress-Free Bar, where you can mix your own drink and pay on the hon­our sys­tem if Ivan’s busy else­where.

Taxi driver Ger­ald Chin­nery will take you from the main pier to White Bay in seven min­utes, just enough time for him to tell you he has 23 sib­lings.

“My dad had five dif­fer­ent women. He was a real is­land ser­vice provider,” said Chin­nery with a laugh.

Wind­star Cruises’ lux­u­ri­ous Wind Surf is a 312-pas­sen­ger sail­ing yacht that’s small enough to glide into small Caribbean ports like Jost.

Our Yacht­man Caribbean itin­er­ary, roundtrip from St. Maarten, also took us to Vir­gin Gorda, Tor­tola, St. Bart’s and An­tigua.

It’s worth spend­ing a night pre-or-post cruise on St. Maarten at the all-in­clu­sive Son­esta Great Bay Re­sort, which is walk­ing dis­tance to the is­land’s cap­i­tal of Philips­burg and its swanky shop­ping street and hop­ping wa­ter­front.

A week on a Wind­star cruise starts at about $2,500 per per­son based on dou­ble oc­cu­pancy.

Check out Wind­star­Cruises.com.

WIND­STAR CRUISES

We sailed into the Bri­tish Vir­gin Is­lands on Wind­star Cruises’ 312-pas­sen­ger lux­ury yacht, Wind Surf.

PHOTO BY STEVE MACNAULL

Bar­tender Mic at the Soggy Dol­lar Bar on Jost van Dyke in the Bri­tish Vir­gin Is­lands will let you pay for your Painkiller with wet money.

PHOTO BY STEVE MACNAULL

Phili­ciano Call­wood, aka Foxy, holds court at Foxy’s Ta­marind Bar in Great Har­bour, Jost van Dyke.

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