Ellie Tesher

Advice with bills, tax obligations, and finances. She leaves everything to the last minute.

Y and I dread talking to her on the phone because if we’re not arguing, she’s preaching about risky investments or alternative medicine or therapy.

I don’t know if her behaviour’s just a personality thing, or is caused by a mental condition. If we were to suggest that she seek professional help, she’d say I’m the one who needs it. What can we do to help her? Concerned Siblings

Q - My son, 22, lives with his dad and has his own son, age two-and-a-half. He babysits him and doesn’t work.

The boy’s mother and my son aren’t together.

My son was previously involved with the law - just “break and enter” or mischief stuff. He dropped out of high school.

We grandparents have to help financially with the grandchild. I’m just so disappointed with this boy. I know he also smokes. I need advice.

No Hope for My Son

A - I urge you to focus where there can be the most hope - on your grandson.

He needs love above all, but also some early childhood stimulation - e.g. through ageappropriate toys, books and music.

A half-day daycare program may also be important by providing the company of other children.

If you and his grandfather can help provide that, and also babysit other times, your son could seek training towards another job.

Ask whether the court system in his area provides a training program for past-offenders.

Encourage him that he can do better, but not by saying how disappointed you are.