The Hamilton Spectator

(Deep) NOT SO thoughts

- SCOTT RADLEY THE HAMILTON SPECTATOR

A few random thoughts for National American Beer Day. Which really should be celebrated on March 22. Which is World Water Day …

GO SOUTH

If you want to buy a pair of tickets to see the Toronto Maple Leafs host the New Jersey Devils next month, you’ll have to fork out $269. Those are for the cheapest seats in the place available on the Leafs’ website. If you’d like to have a slightly better view — in row 16 at centre ice — your bill will be $1,334 for the pair. Throw in parking, a meal and a couple beverages and you’re easily spending $1,500 for the night. Or …

If you want to see an NHL game live, you can buy a pair of tickets to see the Ottawa Senators play against the Florida Panthers in Miami on Nov. 11. Total cost for the tickets: $30. You can then pay for your flights down and back ($738 for the both of you on Southwest from Buffalo to Fort Lauderdale), cover the cab ride to Sunrise (about $50 each way), stay overnight in the highestrat­ed local hotel according to hotels.com ($328), and have a nice dinner out (let’s say $150) and still finish the experience $200 ahead.

GOOD AND BAD

Through 11 regular seasons with the Dodgers, Clayton Kershaw has a 2.39 ERA, a 1.00 WHIP and a 153-69 record including 25 complete games. Most consider him the best starting pitcher in the game, or close to it.

In 23 playoff starts, Kershaw is 9-9 with a 4.28 ERA and a 1.10 WHIP. He has zero complete games and is not considered one of the best ever. Not close.

HMMM ...

This week was the 25th anniversar­y of Joe Carter’s Touch-’Em-All-Joe home run.

Everybody remembers who threw that pitch. Mitch Williams was the unlucky guy who’s had to wear that for the rest of his life. But do you remember who the two future hall of famers were who were on base when Carter connected?

Answer at the end.

PLEEEEEEAS­E!

Here’s betting Blue Jays fans would pay good money for a mic’d up game in which the team’s new manager got into an argument with an umpire over some botched call and in his best Princess Bride accent started repeating over and over, “My name is Charlie Montoyo, you killed my inning, prepare to die.”

KA-CHING III

And now for today’s instalment of the William Nylander Lost Salary Meter.

Based on a 186-day NHL season and a salary of somewhere between $6 million (what the Leafs are reportedly offering, meaning

$32,258 a day) and $8 million (what some reports say he’s demanding which is $43,010 a day), he’s lost somewhere between $838,708 and $1,118,260 already.

WE MISS YOU

Perhaps it’s stating the blatantly obvious to suggest Cleveland is missing LeBron James this year, but the Cavaliers are 0-5 to start this season with the NBA’s biggest negative points difference (they’re scoring 13 points fewer than they’re giving up on average).

MMM, MEAT

Congratula­tions to defending national champion Texas Tech on their first win of the year in intercolle­giate meat judging.

Yes, there is such a thing.

NOT GREAT

Remember when Andrew Wiggins was supposed to become the next NBA superstar? When Canadians were talking about the next massive sporting star from this country? Remember that?

So far this season — his fifth in the league so he’s no longer anywhere close to a rookie — he’s 64th in the league in scoring behind such luminaries as Joe Ingles, Enes Kanter and Rodney McGruder. He’s 117th in assists. And he’s 184th in the league in rebounding.

Not exactly Michael Jordan II.

HAMIL-NOT

Last year, only one Hamilton Bulldog earned OHL player of the week honours despite being one of the top outfits in the league with a raft of top prospects who were playing well. And that lone nod came in the third-last week of the season.

The snubs continued through the playoffs as the team again only got one winner. Which was Brandon Saigeon in the final week of the post-season when choosing anybody but a Bulldog would’ve looked ludicrous.

Well, the warm feelings — sorry if you have a sarcasm allergy — toward the team continues this year. Despite his scorching start (23 points in 13 games including three game-winning goals) Arthur Kaliyev hasn’t been recognized yet. Nor has Brandon Saigeon with his 22 points in those same 31 games. Nor goalie Zachary Roy who stopped 68 of 71 shots in back-toback wins over two good teams.

Hmmmm …

OUCH

Pity the poor Flint Firebirds. Heading into Friday night’s game, they were 0-11 with a league-low 21 goals scored and a league-high 65 goals surrendere­d.

Bad as that is, they have a long way to go if they want to set the record for worst start in OHL history. Back in 1995, the London Knights started their season 0-31-2 — ties were still a thing then — before finally winning the last game before the Christmas break.

SURPRISING

Hands up if you saw Columbus, Philadelph­ia, St. Louis and Los Angeles all in the bottom 10 of the NHL standings at any point this season.

Seeing none, we move along.

WHAT DOES IT MEAN?

That said, every NHL team named after naturally occurring but damaging things — Avalanche, Lightning, Hurricanes and Flames — are in a playoff position while every team whose logo incorporat­es a wing (Blues, Flyers and Red Wings) aren’t. Interpret that as you will.

CUDDLY FIGHTERS

There are a lot of testostero­neinspired fighter nicknames in the UFC. But there are also some that seem to be coming from a softer place. Here are the top five leastintim­idating nicknames in the Octagon.

1. Fluffy Anthony Hernandez 2. Mellow Fellow Jay Cucciniell­o 3. Sexi Mexi John Castaneda 4. The Monkey God Jarred Brooks 5. Violent Bob Ross Luis Pena CAUSE, NOT EFFECT

When the NHL’s Department of Player safety explained its ruling in giving Ottawa’s Mark Borowiecki a one-game suspension for an elbow to the head of an opponent, one of the reasons it gave for the penalty was that Urho Vaakanaine­n suffered an injury (a concussion) on the play.

Meanwhile, Montreal’s Brendan Gallagher dangerousl­y drills Borowiecki from behind in another game and gets no supplement­al discipline. Which really brings us to one of the biggest ongoing problems with the league’s discipline folks.

The punishment should never be for the result, it should be for the action. If something a player does illegally would lead to a punishment if a player was hurt, he should face the same consequenc­es even if the other guy skates away.

Otherwise, you’re running a system of justice based largely on luck.

STILL SITTING

Former Hamilton Bulldog Robert Thomas has now been a healthy scratch in four straight games for the sagging St. Louis Blues. This is generating big interest in Missouri because he’s the franchise’s top prospect. Meanwhile, it’s creating interest here because if he was returned to Hamilton, he’d immediatel­y be the best player in the OHL.

It’s starting to look like one of two things will happen that’ll lead to a resolution. Either he will come back to junior or Blues head coach Mike Yeo is fired and his replacemen­t finds a way to play the 19-year-old.

THE ANSWER

No, not Roberto Alomar. He was due up two spots after Joe Carter if things had gone that far.

In the ninth inning of that game in 1993, Rickey Henderson led off with a walk. Devon White flied out. Then Paul Molitor stroked a single before Carter homered.

Henderson went into Cooperstow­n in 2009 after Molitor had gone in five years earlier.

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 ?? BEN MARGOT THE ASSOCIATED PRESS ?? Andrew Wiggins, right, was supposed to be Canada’s next superstar athlete at the top of the NBA food chain. Hasn’t happened yet.
BEN MARGOT THE ASSOCIATED PRESS Andrew Wiggins, right, was supposed to be Canada’s next superstar athlete at the top of the NBA food chain. Hasn’t happened yet.

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