(NOT SO) Deep thoughts
A few unconnected thoughts for National Toothache Day. Sponsored by unpopped popcorn kernels, ice cubes and that pit you didn’t expect to find in the seedless olives you were pounding back ...
UUURRRRRPPP
Folks who finish the Around The Bay Race this spring will receive some local craft beer when they cross the finish line. That’s fun. But this can’t be the only spot thinking it would be a lot more fun to hand out the samples at the start of the race. Or better yet, at the water stations along the route.
If those ideas are a little to ahead of their time, consider the popularity of the Beer Mile. Perhaps in addition to the 30k, 10k relays and 5k, a fourth option could be brought into play. Lay down the indoor track inside FirstOntario Centre and away you go.
You’re welcome.
DARE TO DREAM
If the NHL season ended today, the Toronto Maple Leafs and Montreal Canadiens would meet in the first round of the playoffs.
Please, please, please ...
SOME HISTORY
The last time the Leafs and Habs met in the playoffs was the spring of 1979. The Canadiens won that series 4-0. The year before that they met with the same result.
In fact, the last time the Leafs won a playoff game against Montreal was the same year they last beat the Habs in a series. Which was the same year they last won the Stanley Cup. As in, 1967.
GOOD LUCK CHARM
One last note on this possible series. If it happened and if the Leafs were to win, history says Toronto will also win the Cup. Because every season the Leafs have beaten the Habs in a playoff series, they’ve gone on to sip champagne. Every one.
They did it in the NHL finals in 1918 before advancing to the Stanley Cup finals and beating Vancouver. Different setup then. But they also did it in the semifinals in 1945, the final in 1947, the final in 1951, the semis in 1963 and 1964, and the final in 1967.
WHAT CHANGED?
Once upon a time, the dunk — back in the early days, the slam dunk — was the coolest part of basketball, and long-distance shooting was a helpful skill but hardly poster-worthy. Today, the tables have clearly turned. For proof, just check out the lineups for the skills competitions at next weekend’s NBA all-star festivities.
Back in 1985 during the first three-point shooting contest, there were eight shooters and eight men in the dunk contest. This year there are four dunkers and 10 long bombers.
WHO?
Another sign of how things have changed in the dunk contest: that 1985 field included Michael Jordan, Julius Erving, Dominique Wilkins, Clyde Drexler and Larry Nance. Household names. Superstars.
The four dunkers this year? Miles Bridges, John Collins — isn’t that a drink? — Hamidou Diallo and Dennis Smith Jr. Not even household names in their own household.
LOTS OF OPTIONS
Has there been a more-interesting time in recent football history? Not even counting the NFL?
CFL commissioner Randy Ambrosie is on a world tour making deals with football associations most people didn’t even know had football, Vince McMahon’s XFLII seems to be rumbling toward reality and just introduced former Oklahoma coach Bob Stoops as manager of its Dallas franchise, and this weekend the Alliance of American Football kicks off.
Is there room for everybody on the dance floor? Guess we’re going to find out.
UM, WOW
Starting this coming season, the CFL will have a front office salary cap. Teams can have up to 11 coaches and 14 other people in football operations making a combined total of no more than $2.588 million.
Meanwhile, at Clemson University, head coach Dabo Swinney makes $7 million — before bonuses — and this season, he’ll have two assistants making $1 million each and another making $2 million. Two others made $500,000, three more made at least $400,000 and another two passed the $300,000 mark.
And the team’s strength and conditioning coach made $600,000.
UM, WOW II
While we’re talking about money, Auston Matthews newlysigned deal with the Maple Leafs will pay him $15,456,562 per season in Canadian money. That works out to $42,347 a day, every day of the year.
The most-expensive factory model of Porsche is a 911 Turbo S Cabriolet. It goes for $277,530 (according to the Porsche Centre Oakville website). Meaning if Matthews started saving today, he could buy one with cash by next Friday afternoon.
WINNER?
Did the Toronto Raptors’ trade for Marc Gasol at the NBA deadline firmly establish them as the favourites to win the East and earn the right to be disemboweled by the Golden State Warriors in the final?
“It gives the Raptors a quality two-way big man who can anchor the defence and facilitate on offence,” USA Today says.
“In the past three months, the Raptors have gone from the clear favourites in the East to arguably the least-imposing playoff team of the big four (Boston, Philly, Milwaukee, Toronto),” Sports Illustrated writes.
“The three-time All-Star and former NBA Defensive Player of the Year raises the Raptors’ ceiling on both ends of the floor,” writes the New York Post.
So, split decision in favour. 32 LETTERS
The full name of Hamilton native Shai Gilgeous-Alexander, who’s in his rookie year in the NBA with the Los Angeles Clippers, is Shaivonte Aician Gilgeous-Alexander.
ROUGH ROAD
If the Leafs meet the Habs in that first round and win, they’ll likely have to play the Tampa Bay Lightning in the second round. The Bolts are, as you know, just the best team in the NHL by a fair margin. If Toronto could win that one, there’s a good chance their third-round matchup would either be against the Boston Bruins who are their kryponite or the defending champion Washington Capitals.
This is the best Leafs team in a long time. But might want to hold off on the parade route for now.
SURPRISING NAMES
Phil Kessel seems like he’s been playing in the NHL for a long time now, and scoring at a good rate most of the time. Which is true. He’s just two points away from hitting 800 in his career.
What’s stunning isn’t that he’s there. Rather, it’s some of the names that have more points than him. Hands up if you would’ve expected to see Ken Linseman (807), Pierre Larouche (822), John Ogrodnick (827), Gary Suter (844) and Steve Thomas (933) ahead of him.
GETTING THERE
Kessel is a very good offensive player. If he continues scoring at the same clip he has throughout his 13-year career, he’ll catch Wayne Gretzky in 34 years.
THE SONG
If you still haven’t figured out why you know that song they play at Scotiabank Arena every time the Leafs win a game, it’s called “Right Back Where We Started From” by Maxine Nightengale. Still doesn’t help place it for you?
It was used prominently in “Slap Shot.”
IT’S TIME
Wednesday morning, pitchers and catchers report for Blue Jays spring training.
That’s the good news. The bad? Have you seen the Blue Jays’ pitchers and catchers?