Playing the Masters without leaving the garage
A golf fanatic and his artist wife created a stay-at-home COVID paradise in their garage
To get to the best private golf course operating anywhere in Canada right now, you simply drive to Ancaster, find the house, knock on the garage door and wait for him to hit the automatic opener.
When it rises and you cross the threshold, you leave the grey chill of Canadian winter behind and enter historic Butler Cabin at Augusta National. Or at least a reasonable enough facsimile to create an envy as green as the jacket hanging on the wall.
“People who come over are kind of in awe,” says Ken Bond.
No doubt. This is the garage every golfer wishes he or she had thought to build. The kind of place that could make you wish the province’s stay-athome order was made permanent. The one place you can play the world’s greatest courses day or night even in your pyjamas.
“It was all her idea,” the retired police superintendent says of
his wife.
Sort of.
Three years ago when they moved to their new home, his imagination was immediately sparked by the height of the ceiling in the two-car garage. Ten feet. High enough to swing a club.
Hmm …
The diehard golfer had been reading about golf simulators for a while. This could work, he thought.
Eventually he found one he liked. He built a little platform, laid turf on the floor, hung protective curtains, placed a small trophy case where the balls from three of the seven holesin-one he’s scored sit, installed a heater and bought a giant projection screen strong enough to absorb the impact of a drive.
In time, he picked up a launch monitor and a Uneekor, which together instantly read the spin, speed and trajectory of the ball and work with the simulator to use computer algorithms to translate its flight onto the screen in video form. Then with some software that allows him to play two exact replicas of real courses, he was set to go.
Had it ended there, it already would’ve been one of the coolest spots in the city. But a few weeks ago he made an off-thecuff remark to his wife.
“Geez, it would be nice to have a mural in here,” he told her.
Kathy is an artist. For years she painted residential murals. We’ll never know if she normally would’ve had the time or inclination to pick up on his hint but in the midst of a COVID lockdown, she needed a project. And she immediately had a flicker of inspiration.
“I know he loves the Masters Tournament,” she says.
He’s been twice. She never has. She’d never even done a mural of a golf course before. But a mix of realism from photos she downloaded and the artistic licence from her creative side led her to see the potential.
Within three weeks she’d turned the already amazing garage into a masterpiece. The drywall became realisticlooking, rich wood panelling. A window through which you have a clear line to the picturesque 12th green at Augusta in the heart of Amen Corner was crafted. Another wall shows a golfer crouching over his ball on
the first green. A photo of Tiger Woods celebrating after draining the last putt was painted on the wall.
And by the club stand is the hook rack. Hanging on one, she painted a life-sized green jacket . Logo on the pocket and all.
“With my name inside,” Bond says.
Yup, right at the back of the collar. The dream of every golfer realized in two dimensions. The pope can have the Sistine Chapel. He’ll take this.
Day after day, he comes out and plays a round in an hour or so. No walking, no annoying groups slowing him down or pushing him to hurry up. The temperature is always perfect, the beer is cheap and the bathroom is never more than a few feet away. There are even birds chirping. Seriously.
“Right now, I’m playing the 100 best courses in North America,” he says.
They’re all on the software. He’s done Hamilton Golf and
Country Club a few times. He’s done Merion. He’s done dozens more. He’s on Pebble Beach right now.
And yes, he’s played Augusta. “They don’t call it Augusta,” he says.
Huh?
The software developers. Guess they couldn’t get the rights or something. So it’s the Masters, it’s just called something else.
Doesn’t matter. He knows. Because of the pandemic, he can’t share his retreat yet which is a blessing and a curse. But a few folks have dropped by to take a peek at the setup from outside the door. One dubbed it a COVID paradise.
Bond looks around at his course for a few seconds.
“It is.”