TAKE YOUR CELEBRATIONS WHERE YOU CAN GET THEM

Finally, we’ll close with some honesty. Golden Knights, you’re probably not going to be very good.

At least not at first. And that’s OK – you’re all about the long-term at this point. But those first few seasons can be pretty rough, and you’ll want to take advantage of any opportunity to enjoy yourself a bit.

We can learn that lesson from the 1974-75 Capitals, a team that stands as quite literally the worst of all-time. They finished 8-67-5, good for 21 points, and the worst points percentage ever recorded. And they opened the season by losing 37 straight road games.

The streak finally ended on March 28, 1975, when the Capitals went into Oakland and beat the California Golden Seals. And when it was over, the Caps celebrated by passing a garbage can from player-to-player, Stanley Cup style.

It may have been the saddest celebration in hockey history. But hey, when you’re an expansion team, you take what you can get.

So there you have it, Golden Knights. Garbage cans, laptop batteries and roulette wheels. Master those key points, and the rest of your expansion journey should be easy.