Grandma plays favourites with plan for her assets

DEAR ABBY: My mother raised my two nephews because of their parents’ drug addiction. They are now adults (21 and 25). Mom was never able to be a fun, doting grandmother to her other grandchildren. I lived three minutes away so I, too, was an important adult in their lives while they were growing up.

I feel my children were robbed of an opportunity that others take for granted. Although they saw their grandmother regularly, she had little left for my kids and her other grandchildren. It had to be a special occasion just for her to baby-sit.

She recently mentioned that when she passes away, she will leave more to the grandchildren she raised than to the others. I expressed that she has other grandchildren and things should be divided equally among them. Am I wrong to feel this way? – LOOKING AHEAD IN NORTH CAROLINA

DEAR LOOKING: I don’t think so. However, your mother’s assets are hers to dispose of as she wishes. While you and I might disagree with her reasoning, I don’t think it should be allowed to become a bone of contention.

DEAR ABBY: I’m a 28-year-old man who works hard at a full-time job and no longer lives with his parents. I’ve always been fairly independent and able to support myself without any problems.

When an unexpected expenditure came up, my family offered to help me pay for it and sent money. How can I reconcile taking their gracious gift when my independent nature was telling me not to? I don’t want to come off as a mooch. – OUT ON MY OWN IN PHILLY

DEAR OUT: Remind yourself why you decided to accept the money, and realize if your parents had considered you to be a “mooch,” they wouldn’t have volunteered to give it to you.