‘I’m an unapologetic snowbird’

Why this retiree continues to go south, despite the judgment of others

“Are you still going to Florida for the winter?”

The question is unavoidable. As the discourse between Canada and the United States deteriorates and the tweets grow evermore inflammatory, many Canadians have made the decision to stay away from the United States and boycott American products here. It’s a choice easily understood and respected. It is not my choice. I remain an unapologetic snowbird.

This seems incongruous to those who know my far left perspective on matters of social justice, feminism, diversity, inclusion and human kindness. I understand when there is the hint of judgment behind the question.

Still, I will spend three months in Florida this year, as I have every winter since retiring four years ago. This is my retirement. I worked for 40 years for this.

I was 50 when my husband and I got married. Our retirement was front of mind. As we spent more and more time vacationing in Florida, the snowbird vision took hold. For 10 years we dreamed and planned, planned and dreamed.

I enjoy our friends and our friendships with Americans — even the ones whose views differ widely from my own. For those who enjoy a good debate, the exchange is respectful. If it gets too much from my perspective, I go for a walk or otherwise remove myself.

More often potentially contentious topics are avoided. I am particularly grateful for that.

Friendship, I’ve discovered, demands shared values. It does not, however, demand like-mindedness. Admittedly, I have struggled with the nuance in that and, from time to time, have succumbed to my self-righteous indignation. My overdeveloped intolerance for intolerance. But it seems everyone is not required to share my opinions, as much as I might prefer it. This is a lesson I have had to learn and relearn with alarming frequency.

It can be hard. In our Florida community (as at home), there are people who embrace stereotypes. Some people believe that Canadians die waiting in line for health care. How else does one explain all those wealthy Canadians flocking to the States for treatment?

Every tragic event that occurs in Canada is reported in the United States, confirming for those uninterested in statistics, that Canada is every bit as violent as the U.S. Based entirely on the price of gas and alcohol in Canada, some believe us to be carrying a crippling tax burden. Some believe we harbour terrorists, that we accept and welcome anyone and everyone who wants to move into the country.

Ironically, this last point has led some people, despairing of the hatred being unleashed in their own country, to think they might move to Canada. Just drive on up and live here. No questions asked.

Some of the stereotypes are amusing. Others are insulting. Most are best ignored. Canadians cannot claim a higher ground in this game. Our stereotypic assumptions about Americans are often equally as misguided and offensive.

Certainly, this year there are tensions between our two countries that have not been there in the past. Accusations and counter-accusations, facts and lies, serious economic impacts all round. There could be a

It can be hard. In our Florida community (as at home), there are people who embrace stereotypes.

negative backlash toward the Canadian snowbird contingent. I don’t expect it though.

Our demographic has memory. Memory of Canada’s response when disaster strikes — hurricanes, fires, floods; memory of Ken Taylor; of

9/11; of compassion and kindness freely given. Memory of long-standing care and concern between neighbours.

And so, I will enjoy our life in Florida as I do here. It doesn’t feel like a betrayal to my country or an endorsement of the United States. It feels like the shared enjoyment of friendship in retirement.

I am reminded of a lesson I was taught very early in life: no one is all good or all bad.

Of course there is pure evil in the world, and I’m not suggesting we ignore that. I am suggesting we be a bit careful though among the regular folk. Our humanity demands a search for the humanity in others.

We treasure our winters in Florida. It is a time-limited gift. Every year when we go back, there are faces missing in the community. People’s lives change. Maybe illness, maybe death, maybe family demands. For Canadians, it’s often the simple reality of unaffordable exchange rates and increasing costs for out-of-country insurance.

We know eventually it will catch us, and our snowbird winters will end. When that happens, I don’t want memories clouded with regret.