Be a host and still have fun
Holiday parties don’t have to be stressful or banish you to kitchen
Hosting a party can seriously drain your energy, but it doesn’t have to. Why should guests have all the fun?
“Forget the idea that a holiday party needs to be an over-the-top affair,” says Brittany Pattner, a creative director for the lifestyle brand Goop. “At the end of the day, your guests are there for you. If you’re in the spirit, they’re in the spirit.”
New York event planner to the stars Bronson van Wyck agrees. “The host’s energy is infectious,” he says. “People want to see you having a good time. They don’t want to see you frazzled, and they don’t want to not see you because you’re stuck in the kitchen.”
Here are tips to lighten your load.
1 Be realistic
Too often, hosts bite off more than they can chew and spend the evening playing catch up. So go easy on yourself. If a three-course dinner feels out of reach, plan something more low-maintenance. Van Wyck’s holiday get-together is a late-night blowout. Usually held the Saturday before Christmas, he doesn’t get going until 9:30 p.m. so that it feels less like an obligation and more like a destination.“It’s loud music, strong drinks, low lighting,” he says. “At this time of year, people want to take the edge off.”
2 Make a thoughtful guest list
Van Wyck has thrown parties for Madonna, major art museums and several presidents, and always begins with the guest list: “Great guests make a great party, full stop.” Invite a mix of close friends and outgoing acquaintances so all you need to do is make introductions, and welcome guests to bring a friend. It’ll be easier on you in the end; nobody likes to babysit. And encourage folks to leave politics at the door. That’s how it was done when van Wyck was one of Washington’s go-to planners. In 2001, after serving as head of events for the Democratic National Convention, he planned George W. Bush’s inaugural ball. “A great party reminds us how much we have in common and sends us back to work the next day with a little more compassion,” he says.
3 Set the mood simply
Forget spending a fortune on decorations. Keep your focus to lighting and music. Simple string lights can transform a dull space, making it glow with warmth and charm. A little background music does wonders to put guests at ease, so make an inviting playlist and position your speakers so the sounds fill the room. You’ll have control over the mood, whether you need to turn it up or tone it down. For a festive touch, Pattner scatters white faux gourds and pumpkins and clusters of cream-coloured taper candles around the room. “They’re neutral and elegant,”she says, and, unlike fresh flowers, she doesn’t have to worry about them dying.
4 Outsource your tabletop needs
New startups make it easy to rent and return tablescapes so you can throw a stylish dinner party without stressing. Choose from a menu of dinner party themes with co-ordinating flatware, linens, wine glasses, candles and more. If you need only extra chairs or a buffet table, try a local event vendor. Basic folding chairs typically cost as little as $1 each; fancier chairs can cost $6 to $8 each. Although it’s perfectly acceptable to mix and match decor, try not to go overboard. “If you mix and match everything, it feels like a hodgepodge,” Pattner said. “Vary the dishware or the furniture, but not both.”
5 Use local wine shop
When Pattner and her husband began entertaining regularly, they joined a wine club run out of a shop in their neighbourhood. The owner offers suggestions for wines to serve based on Pattner’s menu and budget and often orders the bottles, too. Handing off this task saves her hours in planning. Shop owners “usually have relationships with local vineyards,” she says. “You’ve got an on-hand expert.”
Delegate
If a full menu is over your head, consider catering or potluck. A potluck is a nice way to make people feel involved. Pattner orders pies from a bakery in her neighbourhood. “As much as I’d love to be a good baker, I’m not going to attempt four pies for one party,” she says. “I make the dishes I love to make and then order the rest.”
7 Prepare the room
You’ll never enjoy your party if you’re on high alert, watching for red wine spills or fragile items breaking, so clear the general area where you’ll be entertaining. Stow away precious pieces such as glasses or vases, and protect fabric furniture with a blanket or slipcover.
8 Serve the classics
If you aren’t going to hire help in the kitchen, choose dishes you can prepare ahead of time and serve at room temperature. And don’t feel pressured to drum up a creative menu. Around the holidays, people tend to expect classic, somewhat sentimental dishes such as mashed potatoes and stuffing. “Most of us aren’t eating these dishes regularly, so I make them the old-fashioned way, with whole milk and real butter,” Pattner says. “There’s nostalgia in those tastes and smells.”
9 Hire cleaners
They might feel like a splurge, but cleaners can be worth every penny even if you’ve got a tight budget. “Nothing takes away hosting stress more than knowing you’ll have a clean house the next morning,” van Wyck says. “Nurse your hangover in bed.”