We are too quick to choose sides
I just got back from our annual family trip to Martha’s Vineyard in Cape Cod.
In case you don’t know where that is just watch the movie Jaws and that is where we stay. We have been going there for about 25 years.
We started going when a speaking friend of mine mentioned that she had a house there and we would love the island. Well, we stopped by for a few nights and the rest is history. Both families vacation together on the same street with only a single house separating us. She lives in Boston and has four children, so her four and our two daughters have seen each other every year, and now the grandchildren are getting to know each other. It has been and will continue to be a great family tradition.
With all of the turmoil going on in the world over race, religion and sexuality I was taken back one night when I was sitting on our front porch and took stock of everyone that joined us on this year’s trip. We have six bedrooms so the house gets pretty busy. When you add our Boston family into the mix when we have our two family barbecues, we usually end up with about 30 people including parents, friends, children and grandchildren.
This year at our house alone we had myself, my ex-wife, my oldest daughter, her husband and their two children. My other daughter and her husband couldn’t make it this year as they are up in Yellowknife. We also had a lesbian couple and their young daughter and another husband and wife with their two children.
So, let me repeat this again giving you more information about all of the participants. There was myself and my ex-wife and I think you know the story there. Then there was the same-sex couple, one is an agnostic and the other is Jewish along with their young daughter who is in Hebrew School. And the other couple were a husband and wife with their two children who happen to attend a traditional Evangelical Dutch Reform Church and when they got back their son was heading off to bible camp. OK, I want you to read that again and let it sink in.
Oh, as an aside, our Boston friends are Republicans, so you can imagine some of the conversations we had over the two weeks. Here is where it gets good. We did talk about politics and we did talk about religion and other spiritual beliefs but at no time did anyone get angry or personal, we simply stated our points of view respectfully with the aim of educating not converting or winning. There were more laughs than serious discussions as we sat on the porch each night simply enjoying each other’s company and, of course, a few cold ones.
It pains me to see all of the divisiveness in the world today as we fight over who is wrong and who is right. We are too quick to say that if you disagree with me you are against me. And we are too quick to pick sides.
We all come from the same place and we come from the same creator (however you want describe him/her or it). It is time to stop creating the “other” and come together to celebrate our sameness rather than argue over our difference. Just because I am left handed does not make me a bad person or any less a person than someone else is.
I bought a T-shirt at a great store in Oak Bluffs called C’est La Vie. The front had the word ERACISM and the back read “Underneath the Skin, We are All Brothers and Sisters.” I know that all of my friends and family do our best to erase our ‘isms’ on a daily basis. Let’s stop fighting and let’s simply sit on the front porch as a family should so we can celebrate our haves and not argue over our have-nots. Ted Mouradian is a lifelong resident of St. Catharines. He is a professional speaker and author writing on workplace employee management issues. He is a former chair of the mayor’s committee on community and race relations and president of the 2 Percent Factor Inc.