Widow is happy alone, tired of ambush fix-ups

Dear Amy: I feel my situation is more common than most folks are aware of. Let me explain: I’m a 48-year-old woman. I was widowed six years ago.

I have no family left (our children are now adults), and I am lucky to be extremely close to my in-laws.

Here’s the problem: About two years ago, my in-laws and extended in-laws decided that I was “too young to be alone.” Amy, they have started showing up with random “thirsty” men from work, church, the grocery store, you name it!

I’m at peace being by myself. I don’t need money. I love to work in my garden and play with my two cats, while waiting for grandbabies.

I simply don’t want the stress/drama of another relationship.

The holidays are coming, and I have a feeling I will be presented with a string of unwanted random men, either wanting a hook-up, or a traditional (per their faith) subservient wife.

How do I tell everyone to leave me alone, without destroying the deep bond I share with these family members? — CONFUSED

Dear Confused: If you don’t want to be surprised by a poorly curated selection of randos this holiday season, you should contact all of your in-laws and say, “I love you and appreciate your efforts to see me with another partner, but I’m happy now, and I intend to stay single. Please don’t introduce me to anymore men. It’s awkward for me, and it’s not fair to them, because I’m just not interested.”

I can’t resist the temptation to add that, like you, I was once a very happy and solitary 48-year-old woman, definitely not looking for a relationship, when I met the love of my life (NOT through a family introduction, I might add). My life changed radically from that day on, and while I love my crowded life, I often look back on those alone-years wistfully.

My point is this: Keep being you. Continue to advocate for your right to live the life you want to live, but I hope you will also remain open to the possibilities.