Meghan and Harry are a tonic in dark days
Canadians owe a small debt of gratitude to Harry and Meghan, the Duke and Duchess of Sussex.
They have given us a respite from the tsunami of bad news, horrible news, tragically sad news that has swept over us in the past few weeks. The worst, of course, was Flight 752 — 176 killed, 57 of them Canadian. Add to that a drumbeat of other bleak news; deadly wildfires in Australia and floods, earthquakes and volcanoes in other parts of the world.
Not to mention all the depressing news from the world of politics. A buffoon of a prime minister is intent on wrenching Britain out of Europe for no good reason. A dangerous thug is busy establishing himself as president-for-life of Russia. In Washington, an equally dangerous narcissist ignores his allies as he cynically manufactures new international crises to divert public attention from his impeachment woes.
And let’s not forget global warming, the constant menace that hangs over the world.
The Harry and Meghan story comes as a diversion, a ray of light against a dark background of discouraging news. It appeals because it is simple; we can all understand it and debate it. It is also appeals because it is utterly inconsequential.
It doesn’t matter if the Sussex Royals, as they style themselves, manage to escape from the straitjacket of the House of Windsor. No wars will be fought over their struggle. No international agreements will collapse, no governments will fall, and temperature of the world’s oceans will not rise or fall by a fraction of a degree. If Britain can survive Brexit, it can survive Megxit.
The monarchy will survive and so, alas, will the Meghan-obsessed and racist gutter press of Fleet Street.
It really doesn’t matter if Meghan, Harry and little Archie settle part-time in Canada or remain emotionally imprisoned at Frogmore Cottage on the grounds of Windsor Castle. Sure, they would be interesting, a touch of glamour, fun to watch for a while. But the royal novelty would soon wear off,
Their presence in the country would not change anything important, although, to digress, we can dream that somehow the weather gods would take pity on them and the rest of us. Can we realistically expect royals to survive in a land where Edmonton was colder than the south pole last week; Calgary was too cold for the zoo to let its penguins go outside, and Vancouver was forced to declare a snow day?
The question of the day is where they will choose to live in Canada? Will it be Victoria, Vancouver, Toronto or, hypothetically, Medicine Hat? My hunch is Toronto because of Meghan’s earlier connection with the city, but any town would probably welcome them with open arms.
There are quite a few open arms already. They belong, among others, to immigration lawyers, including one in Vancouver who told the Globe and Mail he would be pleased to offer his services pro bono to help smooth the royal couple’s way through immigration and into Canadian citizenship. Other open arms — and palms — belong to real estate agents. Agents in Vancouver and Toronto have already assembled lists of properties that they know would be just “perfect”
for Meghan, Harry, Archie and any other little Windsors that may come along.
Yes, there is a waterfront property in North Vancouver with a view and an elevator that Sussexes can have for a mere $9.7 million. Or how about Forest Hill in Toronto? A modest $16 million will buy a pile on Dunvegan Road with an indoor tennis court and saltwater swimming pool, not to mention an underground garage for eight cars — just the thing for a growing family.
Or, for a mere $900,000 more, Harry and Megan could move into a 14,280-square-foot bungalow on the Bridle Path. It has 11 bedrooms and was once owned by an entertainer who called himself Prince.
And he wasn’t even a real, if reluctant, prince like Harry.
Cambridge resident Geoffrey Stevens, an author and former Ottawa columnist and managing editor of the Globe and Mail, teaches political science at the University of Guelph. His column appears Mondays. He welcomes comments at geoffstevens40@gmail.com.