Grateful For FemFest

I can’t tell you what my favourite book or piece of art is. I don’t have them in any order. But I can tell you the work to which I feel my strongest connection. I was in the art gallery of Sir Wilfred Grenfell College in Corner Brook watching a group of my friends and classmates performing “The Vagina Monologues,” and in the second act, they read “They Beat The Girl Out Of My Boy... Or So They Tried.”

Do you have a song that, no matter how many times you hear it, will always make you want to close your eyes, shut out the world and completely give yourself over to the words and melody? For me, “They Beat The Girl Out Of My Boy... Or So They Tried,” does just that.

It’s worth mentioning that the events in the monologue aren’t the events of my life. It’s told from the perspective of a transgender woman reflecting on her own life. And yet, every time I see it, it always feels like they are somehow telling a part of my story.

I am so grateful for having been there that night. I am so grateful for Eve Ensler having written it. To be honest, I’m just very grateful for Eve Ensler.

And do you know who else I am grateful for? My mother.

In high school, my mom would help me sew hearts and flowers on my jeans and in junior high she never cared if I wanted to wear pink or use our washing machine to dye my clothes purple. The only time she questioned the jewelry I wore was when a cheap plastic ring from the gas station was turning my skin a weird colour.

When I was little she kept a copy of “Outrageous Acts and Everyday Rebellions” by Gloria Steinem on the bookshelf and when I asked about it she told me how different the world can be for women and men.

My mother never asked me to live or think a certain way. I think because she would have refused anyone making that request of her.

When I was five, we visited an art gallery in Toronto and I saw a painting of a nude pregnant woman. It’s worth mentioning that I hadn’t been terribly excited about the visit in the first place and when I saw my mother looking at this particular painting I said something like, “Who would want to look at that?”

And without a hint of annoyance, my Mom said, “I think her body is beautiful.”

I learned so much from her. About loving yourself and others. About empathy. About strength.

And if you’re thinking, “Oh, here’s another man writing about feminism and making it all about him,” well, I guess you’re right. But I still think it’s relevant because I truly believe that feminism isn’t just for women. I think it’s more about realizing and appreciating that we become so much greater when we include and listen to every single voice.

I hope people in St. John’s who had the opportunity got out and supported FemFest and took some time to learn from, celebrate and be grateful for the ideas, creativity and strength of women.

Without them, I wouldn’t be the man I am today.

I am also incredibly grateful for The Telegram’s Tara Bradbury, whose recent commentary (“Hate, misogyny and sexism — all in a day’s work,” Aug. 22) gave me so much to think about. Joshua Goudie St. John’s