High school friends face boyfriend tension
Based on what you say, I would put your friend in this category.
Continue to support her, but understand that she may continue to stay with him, even though he is an emotionally abusive jerk.
Understand that on many levels she knows this, but she is making a calculation: She would rather have stale crumbs from this guy than be on her own. You can help make sure she knows she deserves better.
She sounds vulnerable and insecure.
You should continue to be her supportive friend but you can stop urging her to leave (this choice needs to come from her). Only continue saying to her, “You deserve so much better...”
Some abusive relationship patterns start with that first relationship, and, unfortunately, if she thinks this is acceptable or “normal,” she may continue to have relationships with guys who bully and treat her badly.
You cannot change this, but you should continue to be her loyal friend, even if this is incredibly frustrating and hard for you.
Urge her to do some research about relationships; loveandrespect.org offers a very helpful online chat, as well as a free texting hotline: text loveis to 22522 or call 866-331-9474. Dear Amy: I’m almost divorced. I’ve known my daughter’s boyfriend’s mother since we both were teenagers.
She has been divorced for five years. We’ve had this unspoken thing for each other for more than 30 years. We met for drinks and hit it off, just talking about our kids.
Is it wrong to take this relationship to the next level? — WONDERING Dear Wondering: You say: “I’m almost divorced.”
I say: On some level, all married people are almost divorced.
When you are all-the-way divorced, you should feel free to take this relationship to the next level.
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