Girl, 6, upset by parents’ sex life

Help her to understand, deal with fears

THIS WEEK’S PARENT TRAP

My daughter is six and she is completely obsessed with whether or not my husband and I are having sex. At first it seemed funny, but now she won’t stop talking about the thought of it and gets upset almost every night. I have no idea how to handle this. What do we do? Ati, Burnaby

YOUR TWO CENTS …

Kids are sometimes scared of things that they do not understand. Try your local bookstore for age appropriate books that can open up the discussion about sexuality. Linda, Coquitlam

MICHELE KAMBOLIS SAYS …

You daughter is feeling panicked about something she doesn’t understand. You can help by having many small conversations about body science as opposed to ‘the big talk’.

It may be that your daughter has heard (or even seen) you and your husband in the act, which can be scary for a six-yearold. Empathize with her reactions. Then, reassure her that sex is a private time between you and your husband, that it’s safe and healthy for adults.

Remind her that whether or not you are having sex is an adult choice, not a kid choice and you’ll help her learn some ways to calm down all the worries she might have by having a ‘worry time’ to draw or talk about anything she finds upsetting. Help her let go of the disturbing thought and replace it with something that’s more reassuring. If this doesn’t help resolve her fears, talk to your pediatrician,

NEXT WEEK’S PARENT TRAP:

My 15-year-old daughter is sneaking out at night to go to a boy’s house on a regular basis and my husband and I are considering putting an alarm on the door to finally put a stop to it. We’re furious but I don’t want to feel like I’m ‘locking her up’. What do you recommend? Jaquie, North Vancouver