The Walrus

Life Cycle of the Animal Called She

- By Liz Howard

Wife Mother Mistress Waitress Nurse Whore Maid Maiden Crone Birth Marriage Grave Address Occupation Age

I made a line without continuati­on. My name in red Letters along the belly of this curve. How to cure him Of the colic, the bed wet, the conquest, or the lack Of consent. I haven’t got it in my purse, in my nerve, Or in a hospice of milk. Everything we see could also

Be otherwise. I had another beginning. I took love down From its shelf and inserted it into my orifice. The century That flattered me begged also in roses and spring, I am But a sinner yet retreating. The limits of my language

Are the limits of my world. I took love out of my orifice And buried it by the river.

The picture is a model of reality. I have no sense because

I am between genders in the west end of this dying city.

Give me a balm of women’s kisses. The flame of my dessert. I woke up and texted you: It’s over. I woke up to get myself Some meat. I made a mask of all the features that are receding. The light a bawdry infant disclosed amid a lawn of cosmos.

There is an amber coloured skull in the painting called Vanitas That is my son. My son cannot speak because I have no son. I have a brother on the spectrum. He drives a rig hauling metals. He is my brother but we do not share a father. It is impolite To speak of such things. My headstone could read that I was An animal unafraid to breathe these title’s their speaking.

Subpoena my belief. Love doesn’t work here anymore. I lifted my face into distractio­n. I lifted my hair at its roots, My breasts with wires. When I dreamt the Indian Agent He was the accountant of persuasion. I let down my limbs And replicated. I do not know any other door through Which to enter. Castigate my own body in service to

The tyranny of will which is no altar. There is no take Away in the forest. Who will be invited to eat and devise A plot of land? Make this mantle disappear: the world Is independen­t of my will. I’ve said this. Nothing in me Can ever truly pay the lease.

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