A CAREGIVERS GUIDE, COOKING FOR PALLIATIVE CARE AND THE FAMILY

stroke and then was diagnosed with breast cancer. She also lives with Parkinson’s Disease.

The couple participated in the recipe focus groups.

Ron is now head chef in their home and was concerned with Victoria’s reluctance to try new foods. For lunch, without much exception, she requested either a hamburger or hotdog.

Not long ago, Ron presented Victoria with a plate of Meatloaf Meatballs. And she ate them.

“It makes me feel a lot better, knowing something different can be served,” he says. “It took a lot of pressure off me.”

On this day, Engel leads a team of volunteers in the kitchen at the Centre de sante communautaire. On the menu: corn chowder, meatloaf meatballs, pasta and sauce.

One of the most satisfying parts of his job is relieving some weight of concern from the caregivers.

“The family member, their big concern is he’s not eating, she’s not eating,” he says. “So just being able to get food into people, is the biggest challenge.”

At The Stabler Centre, a 10bedroom home-like residence in St. Catharines for people in the last weeks of their lives, he cooks wholesome meals and often responds to specific meal requests. He also cooks for day hospice, a bi-weekly program which gives people living with a life-limiting, progressive illness a day of compassionate care and companionship.

Marie Gracey, 72, says the food – and playing Crazy Bingo with friends — is the reason she comes here every other week. She’s had cancer twice and lost her bottom teeth, making digestion difficult and limiting her food options.

She appreciates both the nutritious food served and the thought put in to her ability to eat it.

Good food makes her feel well. Keeps her spirits up, she says.

“I’m a Taurus and a red head,” she adds, laughing.

Stubborn? someone prompts. “That’s a nice way to put it,” she says. She has another word: Bull headed.

“When my time comes, I’ll go,” she says. “My mother didn’t raise a coward. I was brought up to fight for myself, so I have to.”

And so she’s here. Fighting. At another table, 71-year-old Denyse Hills of Port Robinson is waging a similar battle.

She was diagnosed a year ago with Stage 4 lung cancer. “I have it everywhere,” she says. “It’s in my brain, it’s in my bones, it’s in my neck, it’s in my lungs. So, everywhere.”

She knows how it feels to lose her appetite.

“It’s not very nice,” she says. “You’re not even hungry and people are trying to get you to eat.

“You have two to three bites and it’s almost like you’re sick of the food.”

A couple pieces of meat and half potato filled her. She lost about 70 pounds. She sees merit in food packed with calories.

Her appetite returned once a few medications were reduced.

“It’s nice to come here and actually be able to finish what they give me, and not send half of it back,” she says.

These days, she’s hungry enough for a second bowl of soup.

“It’s the closest I’ve felt to myself since this all started,” she says.

“And it’s wonderful.”