Lives celebrated in words and song
Songs of the City joins musicians with people who have stories to tell
I’m not a rag doll.
I’m flesh and blood.
These are the words of triumph that begin the chorus of her life song.
On Friday, 26-year-old Elizabeth Bell, a former teen drug addict who lived on the streets and stole to support her addiction, will stand on stage at the FirstOntario Performing Arts Centre alongside Barbara Lica, a Juno-nominated Canadian jazz singer and songwriter.
Together, they will tell the story of her life in words and song.
Bell will share parts of her journey that are deeply personal: Severe depression at 13; introduction to marijuana and the methamphetamine Ecstasy by her boyfriend at 14; and then stealing money from her family to support her addiction.
And that’s only the beginning. Afterwards, Lica will sit behind a grand piano and, backed up by pianist John Sherwood on keyboard and a trio of local musicians, will let her heart speak through the words of a song she wrote about Bell.
It’s called Rag Doll.
Bell’s story, along with the life narratives of three other people, will be told during Songs of the City, a program that connects Canadian musicians with people who have received support from United Way funded agencies, in an evening of storytelling to celebrate the human spirit.
Songs of the City started in 2014, the concept of Michael James, an actor turned entrepreneur who became a volunteer with the United Way in Toronto. His vision was to marry deeply personal life narratives with musical interpretations, as part of an evening of celebration to thank and help donors understand the impact of their philanthropy.
United Way agencies in eastern Canada have embraced the program, and for the first time, the United Way of St. Catharines.
In the spirit of appreciation, the events are always free and open to the public, however the Friday program is sold out.
Musicians Jackie Richardson and Shakura Saida will also tell stories through song. And woven around these narratives are other musical performances that will include the Laura Secord Secondary School Concert Choir, led by teacher Dave Sisler.
The stage will be like an emotional sponge, saturated with stories of courage and defeat, tragedy and triumph, joy and loss.
“Something is created that is so beautiful, so intimate,” says James. “Because they’re willing to share with each other.”
In each case, a singer/songwriter is paired with a speaker through a process that matches characteristics such as personality and their style of expression. A singer carries a weight of responsibility to create lyrics and music that exemplifies an often painful part of a speaker’s life.
One vocalist told James: “I will never get these people out of my head.”
When Lica and Bell met, there was an instant human connection. Lica scribbled notes as she listened to Bell tell her story. Bell was refreshingly candid and open, she says.
When Bell was 17 years old, she was sexually assaulted at a party. When her boyfriend heard about it, he ridiculed her. Blamed her. Then he called her a “f---ing rag doll.”
His words, disparaging, degrading and deeply hurtful, became her internal voice. Slut. Whore. Worthless. “I was nothing,” she said.
She started stripping for fast cash, and using crystal meth to forget about her broken, out-of-control life. “She (the drugs) made me feel like everything was perfect,” says Bell.
Over the years, those words lost their power. Bell went into rehab, and regained control of her life with help from Hope House, an emergency homeless shelter since closed in Welland, and the YWCA Niagara Region which gave her housing and support.
She earned her high school diploma, and enrolled at Niagara College. These days, she has made amends with her family, is in a healthy, longterm relationship and works as a hair stylist in St. Catharines.
Her strength is the essence of Lica’s song, Rag Doll. A belittling insult, transformed into a source of empowerment.
“I wanted to reclaim the words that had hurt her,” says Lica. “I wanted something more triumphant at the end.
“I’m using a word that had hurt her so much and I was afraid of putting her back in a bad place.
“But as humans, we persevere.” Indeed, the last line of the chorus, a line often repeated: I’m stronger than
you’ll ever know.
Bell cried when she read the lyrics “I’m not a piece of fabric,” says Bell. “I’m not something to be thrown away. I’m a person who deserves love.”
She will hear her song in its entirety for the first time during a private rehearsal this week.
And on Friday night, it will be public.
She has shared parts of her story before with smaller audiences because she sees it as an opportunity to work on herself spiritually.
“The more you talk about something the less power it holds over you.”
Something is created that is so beautiful, so intimate. Because they’re willing to share with
each other.”
MICHAEL JAMES
Songs of the City