Takin’ a walk on the wild side

ONE OF THE THINGS about bear hunting that proponents of it rarely mention as a selling point is the long walk out.

That’s probably because it is not a selling point at all. In fact, if someone were to invent a product that would eliminate the long walk out, I might be the first to buy one. The long walk out is not all that fun.

I know what you are thinking – an ATV eliminates the long walk out. But what you are not taking into consideration is that the walk to the ATV is a long walk out, too.

But perhaps I should explain a bit further. The long walk out goes something like this.

You walk into a bear stand with optimism. You enter an isolated stretch of dark woods where your bear stand is set up, you notice the bait barrel has been thrown around and the bait is gone and you smile. You then replenish the bait and notice bear tracks – some suggesting a large bear – are evident too. Logs have been thrown around, trees are clawed – the area basically looks like a frat party just broke out.

You then climb up into your tree stand and sit all alone watching your bear bait for the entire evening

until, at last, legal hunting ends. Nothing has showed up; it’s fairly dark in those woods. So you do the most unnatural thing in the world. You case your bow or firearm – as the law dictates – and you begin the long walk out.

For me, yesterday, that was 100 yards to the old logging trial, and another 800 yards down a claustrophobic dark corridor until I hit the place where I had parked my truck. My truck is a 2005 Chevy Blazer that has seen better days, but on that night I was disproportionately happy to see it.

You see, in daylight, it would be a pleasant walk through the woods.

In the dark, however, you keep thinking that this whole area is crawling with bears. This is in no small part due to the fact you have been attracting bears with your bait.

Then another unassailable bit of logic strikes you. Bears are silent. Bears are black and therefore invisible in this light. Bears can be mean when surprised. A bear, even a small one, can take you in a fair fight.

And here you are in the dark, trying to leave silently so as not to spook them for tomorrow night.

In other places in the world, this might be considered a bit of an IQ test. In Ontario, it is merely a part of the bear hunting process.

If you have an overactive imagination, as I have, you think of exactly where you might bury your underwear should a large branch snap in the immediate vicinity.

I remember one fall bear hunt where I watched a huge sow and her two cubs work a bait across a marsh. I didn’t shoot, even though it was legal at the time, because that sow was with her cubs.

Then just as legal shooting light left, they crossed the swamp to my side. And arrived just as I cased my rifle and began the 150 yard walk out to my truck. For the first 50 steps, all I heard were the wonderful sounds of a mother bear and her cubs scavenging in the dark all around me.

That was the longest walk I have ever taken.

I didn’t have to do laundry when I got back; but it was a very near thing.