Fishing and being under the weather
I HAVE JUST RETURNED from what was probably the worst duck hunt I ever had. And not because of the number of ducks we shot either. That amount was on par with the birds harvested in seasons’ past. The problem was the heat. It felt like we were hunting in summer – in equatorial Africa.
It was so hot, in fact, that mosquitoes only bit the shady parts of your body.
Worse still, there were no autumn colours, which is one of the main things I enjoy about our duck hunts. That, and mosquitoes leaving the shady parts of my body alone.
This is part of a growing and worrisome weather trend that we are seeing more often these days. And it is changing the way we hunt and fish. For instance, the archery season for deer opened on the first of the month but I have not hunted yet because it is too hot to hang a deer for cooling off.
Worse still, it rained fish in Mexico recently. Admittedly, this is a normal thing that happens on occasion. Water spouts pick up fish and travel over land before collapsing. And, yes, they are very small fish. But what if it gets worse? I for one am not going to be
caught off guard. That’s why I am going to ask for a helmet and the biggest fishing net you can buy for Christmas.
That way, if our weather gets more extreme and water spouts start ranging further inland and picking up bigger fish, I will be ready. And, as that first fish fall happens and you witness me running with helmet on to position myself under a falling trout, I’ll yell “Who is the crazy one now, huh?”
Needless to say, should this come to pass, this will change everything.
For one thing, we’ll have to forget about catch and release. Heck, we will be lucky just to catch. Oh, and we won’t need boats, unless of course you feel the need to hide under an overturned one until the fishing gets slower.
For those who are set in their ways and do not change with the times, things will be even more difficult. Heck, it is hard enough to cast a fly so that it lands in the middle of the ring of the trout’s rise. Imagine how hard it will be to try to cast accurately to fish falling at terminal velocity. The worst part is, if they refuse your fly, you won’t have time to tie on a new offering.
On the flip side, landing a fish will be very easy. All you need to do is wait a millisecond. The only issue will be if you land it on the windshield of your neighbour’s car. Suddenly, fish and chips will take on a whole new meaning.
The people I will feel most sorry for are the muskie anglers. I can’t imagine having the nerve to wait there with a net while all those teeth are raining down on you. On the plus side, at least we don’t have swordfish here.
The point is if this happens, I’ll definitely be ready. But, honestly, I hope that our skies don’t rain fish any time soon. I like things just the way they are and I really don’t want to have to ice fish from the other side.
Plus, I look horrible in a helmet.